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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/25467883">A Tale From The Time Of Oblivious Idiots (whom we all know and love)</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nonbinary_dude_chillin/pseuds/Nonbinary_dude_chillin'>Nonbinary_dude_chillin</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Sanders Sides (Web Series)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>High School AU, I really don't know what happened, It started as a joke, It’s kinda like those books were the author gets an award for it being completely realistic, Laser Tag, Multi, Probably not accurate, Self Harm, but it’s actually not, but then I actually typed it, first sanders sides fic, i dont know yet, slight gore, thats definitely what this is, there might be some self harm</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-07-23</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-10-18</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-05 11:09:38</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>18</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>35,419</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/25467883</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nonbinary_dude_chillin/pseuds/Nonbinary_dude_chillin</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Every year Virgil's parents send him to a new school in a different state. This time it's Florida. He meets Roman and they immediately become friends, despite their differences. Then someone in a yellow t-shirt shows up all the way from Minnesota.</p><p> </p><p>Roman lives in a small town in Florida, he paints from the secrecy of his room. And despite all of the fun acting roles he gets in school plays, he finds life quite boring. That is until Virgil shows up. And then someone with green highlights (who also happens to be his brother) has to go and make it all confusing.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>(Backround) Logicality, Anxiety | Virgil Sanders/Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>81</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>72</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Intro</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Hi! Okay the only thing I love as much as Harry Potter, is Sanders Sides. I’ve been debating about whether or not to put this up. But I had a little nudge from one of my friends as well as a couple of people on here.</p><p>So, I’ll probably be updating this story every Thursday? Hopefully? I have a pretty tight schedule but hopefully I’ll manage. This is a high school au. It definitely will not be realistic. Just a fair warning.</p><p>But enough about that! Here are your main characters: (BTW their last names were picked with care, I did a lot of research on the certain meanings of names.)</p><p>Virgil Lilith: 9th Grader, purple hair, always wears hoodies, emo, staying with Patton for the school year, siblings unknown.</p><p>Roman Sanders: brother to Logan and Remus, 9th grader, theater geek, brown hair, very outgoing.</p><p>Logan Sanders: brother to Roman and Remus, 11th grader, nerd, dark brown hair, quiet and likes to read, the mom friend.</p><p>Remus Sanders: brother to Logan and Roman, 9th grader, a certain potty mouth, highly inappropriate, likes to pull pranks, brown hair with bright green highlights, (weird I know!).</p><p>Patton Felix: only child, 11th grader, the dad friend, most of the time very happy and outgoing, light brown/almost tan hair.</p><p>Janus Dolion: 10th grader, siblings unknown, likes lying, is very secretive.</p><p>And those are your main characters! There will obviously be other characters from Thomas Sanders in here, along with Thomas himself. A lot of these chapters will probably be really short so, like Scar always says, be prepared. Hope you enjoy!</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. New School Year=New Friends (and forgetting the past)</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Here's the first chapter. Roman's bit is a little short, but it's for a good reason. Hope you enjoy!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Roman’s P.O.V.</p><p>I'm sitting in my bed scrolling through Instagram when it hit. An idea. I run over to my easel and grab my paints.</p><p>… </p><p>It’s two a.m. when I finally finish. I sit back and admire my work. I’ve been looking for something just like this! A great logo! I know my dream is ambitious and out there but if I really put my mind to it, I could make it work…</p><p>(The logo is Roman’s logo.)</p><p>I take the canvas and slide it under my bed along with all of my other paintings. The only reason I hide them is because my older brother Logan is always snooping in my business and I’d rather not have him know that I like painting.</p><p>See, I kind of have a reputation at my school for being a theater geek. I don’t need to be known as an artsy person as well.</p><p>Logan is the nerd. Nothing more to it. He’s a nerd.</p><p>The first day of middle school he convinced me to sit with him and some of his friends…  Biggest mistake of my life.</p><p>Logan isn’t my only brother though. I have a twin brother. Named Remus. He’s… a very interesting person. And quite horny as well. (Excuse my language.) Remus is not a very good brother.</p><p>He likes to wear my sweatshirts and pretend to be me sometimes. It’s actually quite annoying. We’ve never really seen eye to eye. He likes to hang out with the jocks. Although the only sport he does is football. Not very diverse.</p><p>But he’s also always pulling pranks on me. Like a couple of nights ago he turned on some creepy music and crept up behind me with a knife while I was watching Disney. Like I said: not a very good brother.</p><p>I sigh and put away all of my paints. So much for a good night’s sleep.</p><p>… </p><p>The next morning I wake up tired and trudge downstairs in my pajamas. I see my mom (Reena) sitting at the table reading the newspaper and Logan sitting at the counter with a jar of Crofters jam. There’s no bread in sight though. Logan has this weird obsession with Crofters. (If I had to admit, I love Crofters as well.)</p><p>I walk over to the cabinet and grab the first thing I see. A Pop Tart. I stick it in the toaster and wait. I hear a shout from the hall and I whip around.</p><p>Remus wheels into the kitchen on his skateboard. I’m just able to dodge out of the way as he crashes into the sink behind me.</p><p>I hear my other mom (Kiko) shout from the hall, “Remus! I swear to all things football and/or skateboarding that if you do that one more time you will not be getting any presents on Christmas!”</p><p>Remus bounces up off the floor laughing. “Sorry mom!” He yells before grabbing /my/ Pop Tarts out of the toaster and running out the front door. </p><p>I stick my middle finger up at his back.</p><p>Kiko walks into the kitchen shaking her head. “What are we gonna do with him?” She asks, “Well, at least your not too bad Roman.”</p><p>I clutch my chest as if wounded, “‘Not too bad’! Mother I'm perfect!”</p><p>Kiko rolls her eyes and ruffles my hair. “C’mon. Eat breakfast and go get ready for school. I assume that’s where your brother went. If he isn't in class just give me a call.”</p><p>… </p><p>I shrug my backpack on and start to walk out the front door. Before I can get very far Kiko calls me back, “Roman! Wait up. I just got an email from your principal, he says that there’s a new student from out of town coming today and he wants to make sure they feel welcome. He’s wondering if you can show him his classes.”</p><p>I nodd. “Sure. What’s his name?”</p><p>“Virgil.”</p><p>“Okay!” I shout and run out the door.</p><p>Virgil’s P.O.V.</p><p>Ughh. I hate new schools. Every fucking year my parents send me off to different places. This time it’s Florida. /Yaaayy./ /So exciting/.</p><p>It’s hot. Really really hot. I hate it. Especially since I wear black hoodies all the time.</p><p>I’m currently sitting in the passenger seat of Patton’s car clutching my backpack as if it’s a lifeboat. Pathetic, I know. But I have heightened anxiety and hugging something helps whenever I get too nervous.</p><p>“You alright there kiddo?”</p><p>I look over at Patton and roll my eyes. “Yes. I'm fine.”</p><p>I’ve only been living with Patton’s family for a few days, but he’s already treating me like his little brother. Patton is an only child and he lives with only one parent so he’s kind of taken me under his wing. Which, to be honest, isn’t too bad…</p><p>We pull into the parking lot and get out of the car. Patton pulls out his phone and texts someone. I stand there awkwardly trying to avoid eye contact with anyone.</p><p>Suddenly Patton grabs my hand and pulls me into the school. I stumble behind trying to keep my balance.</p><p>We arrive in front of some lockers and two boys come up to us.</p><p>“Salutations Patton.” Says the taller one. He’s wearing a shirt and tie. A tie. Talk about proper.</p><p>The other boy is wearing a bright red hoodie and a smile on his face. He looks almost too happy.</p><p>Patton pushes my forward. “So um, this is Vir-”</p><p>I turn and give him a look. I don’t want him ruining my chances of actually making any real friends by having to introduce me.</p><p>“I’m Virgil.” I say as confidently as I can, holding out my hand.</p><p>Mr. Neck Tie shakes it. “Logan,” he says, “Pleasure to meet you.”</p><p>Mr. Smiles does the same thing and says, “Roman.”</p><p>Suddenly he’s pushed out of the way. I look up startled. A dude in a green t-shirt and black shorts is standing there.</p><p>“The name’s Remus.” He says confidently. I notice his cock-sure smile, and his group of laughing friends behind him. Ughh. I know these kinds of people and I hate them.</p><p>So I just ignore him and help Roman up. Roman shoots me a grateful look before turning to Remus.</p><p>“Dude,” he says, “Could you not? I’m kinda in the middle of something right now.”</p><p>Remus rolls his eyes. “Well, actually I need to ask you something.”</p><p>Roman smirks, “What now? Did you ‘accidentally’ forget your condoms at home and need to borrow mine again? Or was that just the one time?”</p><p>I choke.</p><p>Remus turns bright red and his groupies howl with laughter. I even here Logan give a snicker and he seems like the kind of guy that has absolutely no feelings whatsoever.</p><p>Remus mumbles something and sweeps past us in a huff.</p><p>Roman isn’t done yet though, “Or did you need more sharpies because you ate them all one night and jumped off the roof of our house?”</p><p>Remus’ ears turn red.</p><p>Roman turns back to us and says, “Sorry about that. Remus is… a handful. To put it nicely.”</p><p>But I’m still pondering what he said, “Wait. You said ‘our house’… are you… you do kinda look alike.”</p><p>Roman nods, “Yeah, he’s my twin. Unfortunately.”</p><p>“Yeesh. I’m not even going to ask about the sharpies.”</p><p>Roman laughs, “Yeah. Hey, aren’t you the exchange student that I’m supposed to show to class?”</p><p>“Oh, yeah!” Patton exclaims, “I forgot! Roman’ll be your ‘guide’ for now.”</p><p>A bell rings.</p><p>“Shoot! We’ll be tardy.” Logan says, then he and Patton run off in a different direction.</p><p>“Will you show me your schedule?” Romans asks.</p><p>“Yeah.” I pull out a folded piece of paper from my pocket, and hand it to him. He looks down at it and says, “Wow. Almost the exact same schedules! We have all the same classes together except for Gym and Tech!”</p><p>I glance down at the paper. “You take Choir too?”</p><p>“Yeah.” Roman says as he starts walking in the opposite direction Logan and Patton went, “Hurry, we’ll be late!”</p><p>… </p><p>I take a seat at the back of the class as Roman heads to the front. He’s obviously quite popular. There’s a few minutes until the final bell rings so I take out my journal. I figure that no one will see me this far back.</p><p>I open the notebook and scan through all of my previous notes and ideas. My handwriting sucks, so it’s hard to read. I squint at a note on the bottom of the page. Does that say ‘Beatrice is the secret weapon’ or ‘Beatrice it the secret villain’? I honestly don’t know how one could mix the two up.</p><p>This notebook is strictly for screenplay ideas only. I have another one at home that is strictly fanfiction ideas.</p><p>I’m so caught up in writing and rewriting I don’t notice someone sitting down beside me.</p><p>“Uhh, hey.”</p><p>I look up, and scramble to put my notebook away. The first thing I notice about the kid is the bright orange beanie.</p><p>“I’m Joan.” The kid says sticking out a hand.</p><p>“Virgil.” I say, shaking it.</p><p>“What are your pronouns? Mine are they/them.” Joan says.</p><p>“He/him.”</p><p>“Nice.”</p><p>We sit in awkward silence for a bit. Until Joan asks, “What were you working on?”</p><p>I discreetly use my knee to slide my notebook further down in my bag. “Oh, you know. Just some ideas.”</p><p>I know that they’re about to ask ‘what kind’. But right at that moment the teacher walks in.</p><p>He looks absolutely ridiculous. Bright purple hair. A crazy zebra print suit with an orange tie. And mismatched shoes. Well. This guy was certainly gonna be something.</p><p>“Good morning class!” He says. Then he points to the board where a name is written.</p><p>“My name is Dr. Picani! And I am your creative writing teacher this year! Now to kick off the year I want to get started on some rules…”</p><p>And this is where I can stop listening. All the teachers do on the first day of school is tell you about the rules.</p><p>My eyes drop to my bag, and as silently as I can I take out my notebook and begin to write.</p><p>… </p><p>My head is still in the clouds when Roman catches up to me in the halls.</p><p>“Hey Virgil. Sorry I wasn't next to you in class. I had to talk to Thomas about the big play that’s coming up. Anyway do you want me to show you to your next class?”</p><p>I nod and ask, “What play?”</p><p>“Oh, you don’t know do you? Every year our school puts on a show from a Disney movie. This year it’s Princess and the Frog. I’m obviously auditioning to be Prince Naveen. I can’t wait till auditions!”</p><p>“How will they portray the part where you're a frog? You basically spend the entire movie as one.”</p><p>Roman blushes, “I think we’ll have to audition in frog costumes, at least that's what Picani said.”</p><p>I burst out laughing.</p><p>Roman shoves me, “Shut up. I want this part really badly. And plus, I've had experience embarrassing myself before I was Simba in the Lion King and had to sing ‘Can you Feel the Love Tonight’ in a lion costume.”</p><p>I start laughing even harder.</p><p>But Roman’s not done, “And I think my great singing and acting skills will make up for the moldy costumes.”</p><p>When I finally calm down I say, “That’s assuming you get the part.”</p><p>“Hey, I never assume! Because we all know: when you assume you make an ass out of Sue and me.”</p><p>I raise an eyebrow at him, “Whatever you say Sir Sing-A-Lot.”</p><p>Roman turns up his nose, “Ha. I like that name and I’m going to use it.”</p><p>I roll my eyes. Then I realize that Roman has stopped, I turn back to him. He points to a door, “Here’s our next class.”</p><p>I follow him into the room and take my seat at the back of the classroom. This time Roman sits next to me. I take out my math notebook and an unsharpened pencil. I sigh. I hate unsharpened pencils, and I don't know why. They just get on my nerves.</p><p>I get up and walk over to the mechanical pencil sharpener. I also hate pencil sharpeners. Right as I'm about to walk back I spot someone walk in.</p><p>Janus.</p><p>Fuck.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Comments and kudos are appreciated! And if anyone has some constructive criticism I'd love to hear it.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Ice Cream and Texts</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Bonus Chapter! I'm posting this today, because Thursday's chapter is going to be really short.</p><p>Hey, so, in this chapter there will be a slight description of a minor panic attack. I know a lot of people have had these before and it's different for everyone. This is just my experience with them.</p><p>Also, I honestly don't know what happened in this chapter, I do have a plot in mind, it's just how to connect the dots that stumps me sometimes. Keep in mind, that this is nothing like my school experience, it's more of a High School Musical reality.</p><p>So yeah, hope you like this chapter!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Roman’s P.O.V.</p><p>I watch Virgil come back from sharpening his pencil. He’s frowning and his hood is up again. Odd.</p><p>He sits down at the desk next to mine and scowls across the room.</p><p>“What’s wrong?” I ask, concerned.</p><p>Virgil snaps his head around to look at me, “Janus is what’s wrong.”</p><p>“Who’s Janus?” I look around.</p><p>“See that kid in the yellow shirt? That’s him.”</p><p>“Oh. Why do you hate him though?”</p><p>“He was at my old school. I have no idea why he transferred here. He was like royalty at that place.”</p><p>Virgil doesn’t explain any further and so I just nod and go along with it. He seems a little uncomfortable about the topic.</p><p>… The Next Day After School… </p><p>“Hey Virge!” I yell seeing the emo walk out of the front door. He looks up and his face seems to brighten upon seeing me.</p><p>I walk up to him, “Hey, do you want to come with me and Thomas to an ice cream place down the road? We always kick off the school year with ice cream. And if you don’t mind our friend Remy is coming too.”</p><p>He shrugs and says, “As long as one of you can drive me back to Patton’s.”</p><p>“Great! Oh, wait! Can I get your number too?”</p><p>“Sure.”</p><p>We exchange numbers and then I grab his wrist and drag him over to where Thomas and Remy are waiting. “He’s in!” I say.</p><p>We all walk across the parking lot and through the field until we reach Beach House Plaza. I lead the way to Oregano's Ice Cream, (Weird name, I know!) and we all step inside.</p><p>As soon as we open the door my ears are immediately hit with the sound of laughter. I turn to the corner. Ughh. Remus and his group of friends are here! Shit!</p><p>I see Conner make an impression of someone writing vigorously and everyone else cracks up. I roll my eyes and continue to the counter to wait for the cashier.</p><p>“Yo Roman!”</p><p>I turn. Remus is standing there. I sigh, “What is it now! Did you shit your pants?”</p><p>This time my insults don’t work. He simply laughs and hands me a piece of paper. I look down at it. I tilt my head in confusion, “Why do you have a coupon for a free one on one lazer tag game?” I ask.</p><p>“Just be there this Saturday. And bring someone with.”</p><p>“Why would I fall for one of your tricks again Remus?”</p><p>“I swear this is not a trick! Why can’t I do something nice for my twin once and awhile?”</p><p>“I honestly don’t think you can be nice to me!”</p><p>Virgil just shakes his head, “C’mon guys let's go somewhere else, the stink in here is giving me a headache.”</p><p>I feel Remy push his way through the door. “Uh. Girl, no. There’s no way a few stinky, smelly, ball throwing dickheads are gonna stop me from getting my ice cream.” He walks toward the counter, but not before yelling back at Remus. “Girl, you might want to buy some deodorant. And while you’re at it, grab some makeup, there's no way you’re covering those nasty pimples with that fake personality.”</p><p>I stare at Remy stunned as the gang howls with laughter and leaves the shop with a tomato red Remus trailing behind them.</p><p>Thomas runs up and slaps Remy on the back. “That was awesome dude!”</p><p>Remy brushes his hand off, “Girl please! This jacket cost a fortune! I don’t need your sweaty hands on it.”</p><p>Thomas laughs. The cashier walks around the corner, whipping their hands on a towel. “Sorry boys.” They say, “I was just finishing a batch of cookies and cream. Can I take your orders?”</p><p>“I’ll take a Superman please.” I say.</p><p>Thomas orders a mint chip and Remy orders chocolate coffee bean.</p><p>“Seriously dude!” I say, “You are literally holding a Starbucks cappuccino! With two shots of espresso!”</p><p>“I know.” Remy says, “Girl you do not want to see me off coffee. I become such a bitch.”</p><p>The cashier clears his throat and looks behind us, “And how about for you?”</p><p>It’s only then when I notice that Virgil is hanging behind us. I immediately know that something’s wrong. He was biting his nails and I could see his rapid breathing through his sweatshirt. I look around at the others. They don’t seem to notice anything.</p><p>“I’ll just take a vanilla bean.” Virgil mumbles.</p><p>While the cashier is getting everyone’s ice creams, I see Virgil slip away towards the bathroom. I hesitate before following him; I don’t want anyone to think I'm a stalker.</p><p>I push open the bathroom door and feel it hit something. I peer behind it to see Virgil on the floor with his hands clutching his hair, breathing hard.</p><p>My eyes widen. “Virge!” I say, dropping down beside him. “Are you alright?”</p><p>I can tell that he can’t hear me. His eyes are staring at the opposite wall, as if he was lost in his own world, and that world was collapsing.</p><p>“Virge!” I yell again, trying not to panic. “Can you hear me?”</p><p>I place a hand on his knee and shake him gently. His eyes snap up and he flinches away. I quickly pull my hands away. “Virgil! It’s me. Roman. Everything's going to be okay. Just breath.”</p><p>Virgil shakes his head and mumbles something, eyes darting around as if trying to find an escape, a way out.</p><p>“What?” I say.</p><p>“I’m fine. It’s fine I know how to handle this.”</p><p>“You obviously don’t.” I say dryly.</p><p>I see Vigil force his breathing to come to a normal pace and he untangles his hands from his hair.</p><p>“See? Perfectly fine.”</p><p>I raise an eyebrow skeptically. “What happened.”</p><p>“Nothing.” He snaps. “I just remembered something.”</p><p>“What?”</p><p>“Look, just drop it.”</p><p>Virgil heaves himself off the floor and pulls open the bathroom door. I wait a little bit before following him out. Again, I don’t want to look like a stalker.</p><p>When I finally leave I see Thomas standing there with my ice cream. I take it and thank him for paying.</p><p>We all take our ice creams and head over to the field behind the school again. I chat with Thomas about the upcoming play, while Remy is scrolling through instagram. The whole time I /am/ aware of Virgil, who seems to be lost in thought and completely oblivious to his melting ice cream.</p><p>Virgil’s P.O.V</p><p>I thought I could handle it. I thought I could get a hold on my social anxiety, but noooooooo. I still freeze up every time I have to say something. Ughh!</p><p>I walk over to my desk and sit down. I need to relieve stress somehow. I pull out my laptop and go into Google Docs. I have several stories going on right now, but there’s one in particular that I want to continue. It’s a Harry Potter fan-fiction. It’s of my favorite ship: Wolfstar.</p><p>I love them together because there’s next to no cannon material surrounding the Marauders’ era, so you can basically do anything! Sirius and Remus were obviously made for eachother. And I think they have so much chemistry.</p><p>But honestly, no one really talks about why you ship the ships you ship. (Sorry that was a mouthful.) You ship them, because one of the characters you can relate to and one of the characters is your type.</p><p>I can obviously relate to Remus Lupin because I know he has a lot of anxiety issues as well as feeling like an outcast because of his wolf thing. He’s also oblivious as fuck. Which I know I am.</p><p>So, apparently my type is crazy, outgoing, full of themselves but also a sweetheart, oblivious, idiot who cares about people? Yes. Yes it is. And also, if you were wondering, I am gay. I’m just not out to anyone yet.</p><p>As I'm typing my thoughts drift to school, and the ice cream place. ‘Why had Remus wanted Roman to go to the lazer tag thing? Probably to prank him.’</p><p>I start to wonder whether or not Roman writes fan-fiction. Knowing him, he’d probably write a bunch of Disney fan fiction.</p><p>I hear a knock on my door and I quickly shut my computer.</p><p>“Hey kiddo!” It’s Patton.</p><p>I get up and let him in. He's holding a plate of cookies. He hands them to me saying, “They're chocolate chip.”</p><p>I take the plate from him and eat one, they’re really good. I glance up at Patton, “Do you want one?”</p><p>He shakes his head, “But I did want to tell you that Logan is coming over to study later.”</p><p>I frown, “Study what? Did you guys really get that much homework on the first day of school?”</p><p>Patton nods, “We’re juniors kiddo.”</p><p>I shrug as he walks out. I open my computer again to write the next chapter.</p><p>When I’m just finishing up I get a text from Roman.</p><p> </p><p>Roman: hey. Whats up?</p><p>Virgil: Nm. U.</p><p>Roman: I'm just really bored. Usually i have homework to do.</p><p>Virgil: yeah. Hey what about practicing for that play audition?</p><p>Roman: i have not the energy young one. (Auditions are tomorrow i need my strength)</p><p>Virgil: ???</p><p>Roman: sry. I'm quoting one of my favorite stories.</p><p>Virgil: which one?</p><p>Roman:.. . .. A fanfiction</p><p>Virgil: oh.</p><p>Roman: just forget i said anything</p><p>Vigil: no, i meant ‘oh you read fanfiction too.’</p><p>Roman: oh! Wow, okay. So do you know the monologue I'm talking about?</p><p>Virgil: maybe. Will u type it?</p><p>Roman: sure. Hang on.</p><p> </p><p>I put down my phone, but I do have an inkining about where that might be from. Suddenly I get an idea, I go into contacts and click on Roman’s name, I smirk as I change it to Sir Sing-a-Lot. Then I get a really long text. I open messages.</p><p> </p><p>Sir Sing-a-Lot: “But why?” Harry asked. Dumbledore sighed, “I have not the energy young one. One day Tom will have been defeated, and all that will be left is you standing in the morning sun. I have much to teach you. But not today. Today I while away on earth, with this maimed hand and overused brain. And as much as I hate to admit it, you will do the same. But do not fret, your time to rise will come.”</p><p>Sir Sing-a-Lot: the story’s called: Rise of the Slytherin. Where Harry gets Sorted into Slytherin instead of Gryffindor. It’s actually a really good story!<br/>
Of course, it's a Drarry fanfiction, that’s my OTP. Even though I’m not gay. I think they’re cute together.<br/>
(BTW I don’t have anything against the LGBTQ community, I’m a huge ally. I’m not poisoned with hate like some people are.)<br/>
And it’s by one of my favorite authors: Emo_Nightmare. They’re on AO3 and Wattpad.</p><p>Virgil: I know.</p><p>Sir Sing-a-Lot: oh, so you know the author? they haven't updated in a while.</p><p>Virgil: again, i know. And im sorry about that.</p><p>Sir Sing-a-Lot: but how is it-</p><p>Sir Sing-a-Lot: ohhhhh, WAIT ARE YOU EMO_NIGHTMARE?</p><p>Virgil: yup. ;)</p><p>Sir Sing-a-Lot: your lying. I don't believe u.</p><p>Virgil: cross my heart, hope to die, stick a pencil in my eye.</p><p>Sir Sing-a-Lot: that’s a weird phrase, but u still haven't convinced me, give me your password and username.</p><p>Virgil: promise not to delete anything?</p><p>Sir Sing-a-Lot: your my favorite author, why would i do that?</p><p> </p><p>I feel a blush creep into my cheeks. Why though?</p><p> </p><p>Virgil: Username: Emo_Nightmare<br/>
Password: creepycookieinc.</p><p>Sir Sing-a-Lot: alright, I believe you.</p><p>Sir_Sing-a-Lot: and I changed ur name to Emo_Nightmare in messages. ;)</p><p>Emo_Nightmare: well ur name is Sir Sing-a-Lot so, yeah.</p><p>Sir Sing-a-Lot: oh, ha ha. Very funny Virgil.</p><p>Emo_Nighmare: oh, wait. R u actually going to go to that lazer tag thing?</p><p>Sir Sing-a-Lot: oh, probably not. Remus’ going to prank me.</p><p>Emo_Nightmare: he does seem to be the type to do that. Sry.</p><p>Sir Sing-a-Lot: it’s fine. Even tho he’s my brother, we don’t see eye to eye at all.</p><p>Emo_Nightmare: oof.</p><p>Sir Sing-a-Lot: yeah, well. Family.</p><p>Sir Sing-a-Lot: wait that reminds me! Who the hell is Janus?</p><p> </p><p>I sit and stare at my phone screen until it goes dark, debating whether or not I should tell the theater geek.</p><p> </p><p>Sir Sing-a-Lot: Virge? U there still?</p><p>Emo_Nightmare: I don't really like to talk about it, but he’s my ex boyfriend. I can't believe he transferred to Florida all the way from Minnesota. He was literally the most popular dude at our old school. I didn’t even tell him where i was going and somehow he found out!</p><p>Sir Sing-a-Lot: that’s fishy.</p><p>Emo_Nightmare: ikr</p><p>Sir sing-a-Lot: but why follow you all the way across the country?</p><p>Emo_Nightmare: he was really mad when we broke up and wanted revenge.</p><p>Sir Sing-a-Lot: so he came all the way here to get it?</p><p>Emo_Nightmare: u know. Ur not as dumb as u look.</p><p>Sir Sing-a-Lot: i take great offense!</p><p>Emo_Nightmare: 🙄 whatever</p><p>Sir Sing-a-Lot: oh sry Virge, i gotta go: voice lessons!</p><p>Emo_Nightmare: bye</p><p>I flop against a pillow, a small smile on my face, and try to sleep.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Thanks for reading! And if anyone has some constructive criticism I'd love to hear it!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Auditions and Enemies</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>And here we go. Next chapter. This one is a little short, due to 'dramatic tension.' Sorry! Hope you enjoy!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Roman’s P.O.V.<br/>… The Next Day…</p><p>“Hey Pat! Hey Virge!” I say when I spot them walking up to me. I immediately know that something’s wrong. Patton looks a little disheveled and there are bags under his eyes.</p><p>“You good, Pat?” I say, studying him closely. He nods and plasters a fake smile on his face. “Have you seen Logan? I need to talk to him.</p><p>“He actually stayed home today, he was sick.”</p><p>Patton nodded again, creased his eyebrows, and took of down the hall.</p><p>I glance at Virgil, “What was that all about?”</p><p>He looks just as confused as me, “I don’t know. He was fine last night. But there was something I wanted to ask you.”</p><p>“What?”</p><p>“Aren't your auditions today?”</p><p>“Yeah.”</p><p>“When?”</p><p>“After school at three.”</p><p>“Can I come?”</p><p>(“Kinky!” Shouts Remus on the other side of the hall.)</p><p>I glare at him before turning back to Virgil, who is slightly red in the face.</p><p>“People normally don’t, but sure, I’d love company while I wait!”</p><p>He smiles at me, “Alright, I’ll be in the auditorium at three then.”</p><p>… Three o’clock in the Auditorium… </p><p>I see Virgil walk in the door to the auditorium. He waves and I wave back. I’m sitting in one of the seats in the audience waiting for the director to get here. He walks over and sits down right next to me.</p><p>“How’s it going Virge?” I ask.</p><p>“Not good.” He says quietly. I notice that his hood is on and his hands are shoved in his pockets.</p><p>“Why not?”</p><p>“Janus.”</p><p>I nod, remembering our conversation the night before. “Hey! I know something that’ll cheer you up!”</p><p>“What? And I don't need cheering up, I’m fine.”</p><p>I roll my eyes. “Just wait here!”</p><p>I get up and walk over to the green room. I had noticed all of the costumes hanging up next to a sign when I walked in. I read it now. It says:</p><p>‘Hello students! I know this isn’t the normal procedure, but all of you will take the costume you want to audition in and change. Just to get you into character! I’m trying a new and improved way of auditioning! We will have individual auditions in the costumes first and then we'll have the group ones! (By the way, these are old costumes and not the actual one’s we’re using in the show.)’</p><p>I smile, this will surely make Virgil laugh. I grab one of the frog costumes off of the hook. It’s old and battered but it’ll do.</p><p>When I come out of the changing room, I sneak up behind Virgil intending to scare him. He’s on his phone right now, so I creep up. I’m about to grab his shoulders when he says, “I know you're there Roman.”</p><p>I sigh, “You have no sense of fun, Dr. Gloom.”</p><p>He turns around, and immediately starts cracking up. I pretend to be offended as I roll my eyes, “How dare you laugh at Sir Sing-a-Lot’s spectacular costume!”</p><p>Just then I see the director walk in the door and I slap a hand over Virgil’s mouth muffling his laughter. I nod at the director and he shuts up.</p><p>“Hello stupendous students! I’m Dr. Picani! You might have me as your creative writing teacher, but that’s not what this is about! It’s about theater. I see you all are in costume. Good, good. This may seem a little weird and strange, but I’m just trying to Dora the Explore it!”</p><p>Everyone groans.</p><p>“We’ll start with individual auditions, which is also weird, but I just want to get those over with before we move on to the large group ones! So will Celear Mcgravis please come to the green room with me?”</p><p>I spot another guy in a frog costume follow Picani to the green room.</p><p>“Now we wait, I guess.” Sighing I sit down, this is going to be a long day.</p><p> </p><p>Virgil’s P.O.V.</p><p>I’m really nervous for Roman. I know he’s done stuff like this before but I don't think he’s ever gotten this big of a part. I keep glancing at the green room door wondering how his audition is going. It’s surprising that I care this much anyway. I turn my head back to my phone. </p><p>I’m scrolling through Gay Tik Tok with my headphones on at the moment. Most of them are stuff I’ve already seen before. I’m incredibly bored.</p><p>When I’m scrolling past a thirst trap when I notice a flash of yellow. I turn my head. I see yellow Dr. Facilier gloves. Someone is walking toward me. Shit. I quickly put my hood up.</p><p>Unfortunately they stop right in front of me. I hear a voice I haven’t heard for a long time, but I still hate with as much vigor as I did back then.</p><p>“Virgil. Could that be you? Or are my eyes deceiving me?”</p><p>I lift my head up to look daggers at Janus, “The question that really should be asked is: how did you find me?”</p><p>He ignores my question. “Virgil, I /adore/ the more intense eyeshadow. It /totally/ doesn't make you look like a raccoon.”</p><p>I smile sarcastically, “Nice gloves. Did you just finish washing some dishes?”</p><p>“Yes…”</p><p>I roll my eyes, “What do you want Janus!”</p><p>“I can’t just say hello to my friend without being yelled at?”</p><p>“No! No you can’t And you're not my friend.”</p><p>Janus ignores me again. “So Virgil, what part are you auditioning for?”</p><p>“None.”</p><p>“Oh so, you're here because you have nothing else to do then?”</p><p>I purse my lips, “No. I’m actually waiting on someone.” I spot Roman coming out of the green room, “And here he is now! Hey Roman!”</p><p>I get up and walk away, grateful for the excuse to leave. “How’d it go?” I ask.</p><p>His eyes were bright, and he was full of energy, “It went great! I nailed it! I think.”</p><p>“Great!” I say. Feeling happy that he’s happy.</p><p>“Who’s that?” Roman asks, pointing back at the place where I was sitting.</p><p>I lower my voice, “That’s Janus.”</p><p>His eyes light up with understanding, then they narrow. “Janus. Come one let's go.”</p><p>He grabs my arm and drags me out of the hall. “Roman wait!” I shout, “What about your auditions! You still have the group ones, those are important.”</p><p>Roman’s face is grim when he says, “Well, getting you away from that creep is even more important. C’mon, I’ll get Logan to drive us home, he should be done with his robotics class by now.”</p><p>“Roman! I’m not letting you give up your role for me!” I say yanking my arm back. “Go back!”</p><p>He looks unsure for a moment. So I say, “I’m fine. Janus can’t do anything to me in school. Just go! I’ll wait out here.”</p><p>Roman hesitates so I roll my eyes and push him back toward the auditorium. He finally walks back but not before looking back at me. I wave my hand at him in a ‘hurry’ motion, he takes the hint and goes inside.</p><p>As I slide my back down the wall to sit and wait, I can’t help but feel touched. I let a small smile creep on my lips as I open Tik Tok.</p><p>Roman’s P.O.V.</p><p>After Virgil insisted that I went back I nailed the group auditions. I was glaring daggers at Janus the whole time too. He was auditioning for that creepy voodoo dude. He /is/ a creepy voodoo dude. He’s so sly. Even off the stage. I need to keep him away from Virgil.</p><p> </p><p>… 3:01 am… </p><p>I jolt awake.</p><p>There’s someone in my room.</p><p>I stay completely still as I open my eyes a crack. I see the shadow bend down in front of my bed. I hear a shuffling  sound and I suddenly know what’s happening. </p><p>They’re looking for something under my bed!</p><p>My paintings are under my bed.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Hope you enjoyed it! Constructive criticism, comments and kudos are always appreciated!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0005"><h2>5. Laser Tag.</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Warning: Mentions of drugs.</p><p>Hey y'all. So here's another bonus chapter. I really don't know what happened here. It started as a joke between me and one of my friends, but then I got an idea for a plot point. So yeah, it just kind of went from there.</p><p>Just please read it all the way through, it makes no sense at first, but we'll get there, don't worry.</p><p>Anyway, hope you enjoy!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Roman’s P.O.V.</p><p>I hear the person crawl under my bed, and that’s when I act. I jump out of my covers and grab their ankles, pulling them out. I flip them over and put a knee to their chest. </p><p>Wait. </p><p>The breath leaves my chest in a single huff.</p><p>It’s Remus.</p><p>“What are you doing here?” I demand, standing up.</p><p>Remus shrugs, getting up as well, “Trying to find ways to blackmail you.”</p><p>I narrow my eyes, “You won't find anything in here. Now leave before I give you a black eye!”</p><p>Remus smirks, “Make me.”</p><p>‘Kinky little shit!’ I think. I raise my fist, but before I can swing he holds something in front of his face. I stop in midair.</p><p>It’s one of my paintings. The one of a storm cloud. </p><p>No! He fucking found them!</p><p>Remus smirks and puts it behind his back, “I think I’ll just keep this! And maybe, just maybe if you don’t go to that laser tag game I’ll expose you.”</p><p>I scoff, trying to act as if I don't care. “Why would I care if anyone knew I was a painter?”</p><p>“Because I can also tell them all about how /gay/ you are.”</p><p>I freeze, terrified. He cant know I’m gay! That’s my biggest secret! I’ve kept it hidden! </p><p>“How do you-”</p><p>“Roman please, you don’t exactly hide your diary's!”</p><p>“Remus. Just give me back my painting!”</p><p>“Nah.” Remus says, then takes off, sprinting out of my room.</p><p>I run after him but he’s gotten a head start and is already locked away in his room.</p><p>I want to yell and pound on the door for him to come out. But I know I shouldn't wake anyone else. Defeated, I slump back to my room. </p><p>When I'm about to close the door I hear a soft yell, “If you go to that laser tag game, your secret will be safe with me.”</p><p>I sigh and flop down on my bed.</p><p>I guess I have no choice. I have to go to that laser tag game. I can't let Remus tell anyone!</p><p>I mean, how bad can it be?</p><p>Who am I kidding… it's going to be really bad. Because I know that Remus will be planning a prank. And it’ll probably involve something illegal.</p><p>I pick up my phone, debating on who to ask. Not Thomas, he has voice lessons that day. Not Remy, he won't touch anything that isn’t sanitized first. I consider Patton, but then decide against it, knowing that he is far too bubbly. There’s only one more person.</p><p>Sir Sing-a-Lot: hey Virge u up?</p><p>Emo_Nightmare: yeah, why?</p><p>Sir Sing-a-Lot: so you know that laser tag game remus wants me to go to?</p><p>Emo_Nightmare: yeah… what about it?</p><p>Sir Sing-a-Lot: well, I'm going… and I want to know if you can come with me.</p><p>Emo_Nightmare: why the sudden change of heart?</p><p>I pause, trying to think up a good lie.</p><p>Sir Sing-a-Lot: he promised that he wouldn’t prank us</p><p>Emo_Nightmare: and you trust him?</p><p>Sir Sing-a-Lot: yes?</p><p>Emo_Nightmare: not very convincing</p><p>Sir Sing-a-Lot: well, he gave me a reason to trust him. He told me a secret that I'm supposed to keep.</p><p>Emo_Nightmare: i don’t know if i trust that, but i trust you</p><p>Sir Sing-a-Lot: so r u in?</p><p>Emo_Nightmare: sure</p><p>Sir Sing-a-Lot: great! I'll see you tomorrow at this address: ___________ </p><p>Emo_Nightmare: night Roman.</p><p>Sir Sing-a-Lot: goodnight Virgil!</p><p>I shut my phone off and try to get some sleep, knowing that it won't come easily. Not with Remus knowing my secret.</p><p>… </p><p>I fiddle nervously with my hair. Doing this laser tag thing seems like a date. I’m definitely having second thoughts. Why did I do this? This was such a bad idea.</p><p>I take a deep breath; panicking will get me nowhere. I reach in my coat pocket and I feel the coupon and the other thing I might need. </p><p>A lock pick. I know Remus is planning something and I know that he’s probably going to lock us in. I’m not the best at picking locks, but I can do it if I have to.</p><p>I see Patton’s car pull up and Virgil get out of the passenger seat. He waves goodbye and then walks over to me.</p><p>“Hey.” The emo says.</p><p>“Hey.” I respond, trying to stop my face from turning as red as my sweatshirt. “So, umm. I know Remus promised not to prank us, and I do trust him… But for safety reasons I brought a lock pick.”</p><p>Virgil rolls his eyes, “So you don’t actually trust him then?”</p><p>“Of course I do! I just bring this wherever I go. As a safety precaution.”</p><p>“You might need some lessons from Janus about how to lie.” Virgil scoffs, then he grabs my wrist and drags me inside, “Best get this over with.”</p><p>When we walk through the door the first thing I notice is that it’s not just a laser tag place, but also and arcade with a prize booth.</p><p>I hand the coupon to the man at the counter with a bored look on his face and he leads us to a waiting room with a bunch of vests. We put on the vests and then he hands us the laser guns.</p><p>“Just wait here until I open the door and then you can start the one on one game. And if you want to end it early you just get in sight of the nearest security camera and wave your hands around. Someone'll come get you.”</p><p>He walks away and we wait for the door to open. </p><p>I turn to Virgil, “If you see anything unusual, just tell me okay, then we’ll get out.”</p><p>Virgil looks at me questioningly, “You don’t seem like you trust him at all. Did Remus somehow make you do this?”</p><p>I shake my head, hoping he’ll believe my lie.</p><p>When he finally comes back to open the door my vest turns from black to glowing red and Virgil’s turns to purple. I run ahead and hide behind one of the many walls, stairs and outcroppings. This place is by far the fanciest gaming place I've ever been to.</p><p>I’m creeping around a pillar when I notice it. A bucket. Right over my head. Why is that there?</p><p>Oh!</p><p>I feel my vest buzz and I turn to see Virgil behind me with a triumphant look in his eyes. I shake my head and point at the bucket about us.</p><p>I see the emo’s eyes widen in surprise and understanding. </p><p>“Let's get out of here.” He mumbles. I can see that his anxiety is starting to kick in.</p><p>I look around for the nearest security cameras and wave my arms around hoping to get their attention.</p><p>“Wait!” Virgil says, grabbing my shoulder. “What if these things have motion sensors?”</p><p>“They don't, they would have gone off by now.”</p><p>I wave my hands again and look back at the door. Nothing’s happening. I'm confused. I wave my arms for the third time. Still nothing.</p><p>I shake my head, guess we’re going to have to do this the hard way. I walk over to the door and pull out the lock pick.</p><p>“Wait!” Virgil says again.</p><p>I turn, “What?”</p><p>He points to a spot above my head. I glance up. It’s a digital clock that’s counting down. “Isn’t that when our time ends?” I ask.</p><p>Virgil shakes his head and glances at his watch, “We should have fifteen minutes left. This thing says we only have two.”</p><p>“But he said it was for twenty-five minuets. Unless… unless it’s when those buckets are going to drop!”</p><p>I shove the lock pick in the key hole, trying to open the door. I hear Virgil panicking behind me. But all I can think about is how Remus is going to die when I get home.</p><p>“One minute!” Virgil says.</p><p>I try a different angle.</p><p>“Forty-five seconds!”</p><p>Another angle.</p><p>“Thirty seconds! Hurry Roman!”</p><p>Maybe this one.</p><p>“FIFTEEN SECONDS!”</p><p>This one had to work!</p><p>“Roman!”</p><p>I feel something hit my head. It’s so heavy that I collapse and there’s a thud as Virgil does the same. A siren comes on and I hear the door bang open and voices shouting. I lift my head, the workers are all around assessing the damage.</p><p>I look down at my hands. They’re covered in green slime.</p><p>Really Remus?</p><p>… </p><p>I stand outside in the rain with Virgil. The employees had given us towels to get the slime off with. And they had given us several more gift cards to come back. The manager had apologized profusely and told us they didn’t know what happened; that there was no footage of the incident or anyone who rigged it because the cameras had been down since that morning.</p><p>They might not know who did it, but I do. Of course Remus would prank us. But I had no choice! I don't want the world to know my secret.</p><p>But now I'm going to hate myself forever, for dragging Virgil into this. I turn to him and open my mouth to apologize. But I stop.</p><p>Because all he’s doing is standing there, staring at his phone. But he looks incredibly good doing it. His hair is wet from the rain and there’s a towel draped over his bare shoulders. He’s not wearing his sweatshirt! Instead he’s wearing a purple tank top. I feel the breath being knocked out of me. Oh shit.</p><p>“You're staring loudly.” Virgil says looking up at me. “Is there still slime in my hair?”</p><p>“Uhh, no.” I say. My throat feels really dry. “I just wanted to apologize for dragging you into this mess. I trusted Remus and then he pulled this shit.”</p><p>Virgil shuffles his feet uncomfortably, “Yeah well. At least now you can expose his secret.”</p><p>I shake my head, hoping Virgil would understand, “I don’t really want to.”</p><p>“Okay.”</p><p>We stand in silence until my mom comes to pick us up.</p><p>… </p><p>I corner Remus after dinner.</p><p>“What the hell was that?” I shout, just as he’s about to escape to his room.</p><p>“What was what?” He asks, innocently.</p><p>I grab his wrist and drag him to my room. I slam the door shut and round on him, “Tell me!”</p><p>“Fine.”</p><p>“What?” I had not expected that.</p><p>“I’ll tell you.”</p><p>“Then get on with it!” I demand.</p><p>Remus takes a deep breath and launches into an explanation, “Well, I obviously had to disable the security cameras this morning so they wouldn’t see me rigging the slime buckets. Then all I had to do was blackmail you into going. By the way, I never found your diarys, it was just a lucky guess. And anyone would know that you were gay by the way you look at Virgil.</p><p>“Anyway, you fell for it and went to the game, that was all the distraction I needed. When all of the staff heard the siren they ran to see what went wrong. I got the weed from a secret compartment behind the front desk.”</p><p>I stare at my twin, “You sick fuck.” I whisper in shock, “Weed? Stealing? Remus, I’m calling the cops!”</p><p>I whirl around but he grabs my wrist, “No you won’t. Because /you/ did that. I’ll tell them you did it. And you have no evidence. All of the cameras were turned off. And you don't know where I stashed the weed.”</p><p>“I’ll have the cops look for it then!” I yell, trying to shake his hand off.</p><p>“No, you won’t. Unless you want to have everyone know your secret.”</p><p>I freeze.</p><p>No.</p><p>No, he wouldn't.</p><p>He can't!</p><p>“Give it up Roman, and don’t get involved in my business.”</p><p>With that, Remus walks out of my room.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Hey thanks for making all the way through. I know, it was a train wreck. And poor Roman, but it'll get better. I promise!</p><p>Comments, kudos and constructive criticism is always welcome. Have a great day! &lt;3</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0006"><h2>6. Where is Patton's Cardigan?</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Hey yall. So here's your next chapter. It's shorter than usual. No warnings for this one. Little update, I just got a tooth pulled this morning. It was a very unique experience. And by unique I mean I was absolutely terrified.</p><p>And also, I will not be posting next week. I will be up north in Duluth Minnesota. We are going on a camping trip for my mother's birthday on Saturday. But I will be back after that.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>I stare at my phone screen. Roman still hasn’t responded and I texted him five minutes ago. My anxiety is kicking in.</p><p>Emo_Nightmare: hey Roman u good?</p><p>Emo_Nightmare: Roman? R u ignoring me?</p><p>Emo_Nightmare: roman seriously! Cut it out.</p><p>Emo_Nightmare: roman! R u okay?</p><p>Emo_Nightmare: roman, please answer!</p><p>Emo_Nightmare: roman! Your fricking scaring me!</p><p>Why isn’t Roman responding? It’s nine o'clock in the morning! What if he’s hurt, or dead. Or maybe he doesn’t even want to talk to me! Or maybe he doesn't even like me!</p><p>My palms start to sweat, I grip the sheets on my bed and struggle to breath. I need to stop panicking, I don’t even know where he is right now.</p><p>Wait.</p><p>Stop. </p><p>It’s stupid to panic if someone doesn't respond. Especially if you don’t know where they are.</p><p>I feel my breathing relax and I’m relieved that it didn't spiral into a full blow attack. I let out one last breath and look back at my phone screen.</p><p>Sir Sing-a-Lot: Hello Vigil. I apologize for scaring you. I slept in. I'm sorry I can't talk. I have business to attend to.</p><p>At least he’s okay. I feel kind of disappointed that he can’t talk but I also can't expect him to talk to me all the time.</p><p>I sigh and walk over to my desk, time to write.</p><p>…Monday… </p><p>I see Roman walking down the hall toward me.</p><p>“Hi!” I say, as he nears me.</p><p>“Hey.” He replies.</p><p>The first thing I notice is his tone. He seems to be as bright and cheery as always, but there’s an underlying hint of something else. Next are the bags under his eyes, he said he slept in o Sunday, so he should be well rested. And finally is the slump in his shoulders, he usually holds himself up high and walks, dare I say, like a prince. But now his shoulders are hunched and his posture is almost exactly like mine.</p><p>“You okay, Roman?” I ask.</p><p>“Yeah, there’s just a lot on my mind.” He responds as we walk down the hall to our first class.</p><p>“Oh, is it about auditions?”</p><p>He nods, “They’re going up in a couple of days and I’m really anxious about the roles.”</p><p>“Hey, don’t stress about it. There’s nothing you can really do anyway. We just have to wait and see.”</p><p>“I guess.”</p><p>I narrow my eyes, “Seriously, what's wrong?”</p><p>He sighs, “I just need to apologize for dragging you into that.”</p><p>I roll my eyes, “Geez, you already did that, Sir Sing-a-Lot.”</p><p>He cracks a small smile at that. And my heart flutters. His smile is amazing.</p><p>“Oh!” I say, remembering, “Could you help me with an assignment after school today?”</p><p>“Sure, I have voice lessons though, so you'd have to come over at five or something.”</p><p>“Alright. Sounds good.”</p><p>We walk into Dr. Picani’s class and sit down. I take my usual seat by Joan and Roman goes to sit by Thomas.</p><p>The whole time we’re supposed to be working on an original price of writing, I keep sneaking glances at Roman, trying to figure out what’s wrong.</p><p>Unfortunately, Joan notices, “Oooh, someone has a crush.” </p><p>I feel my face heat up, “What? No I don’t. Roman’s just down today, I'm wondering what's wrong.”</p><p>“Suuurrrrree.” They tease.</p><p>“No seriously. Don’t you notice that he’s a little off?”</p><p>They ignore me, “Virgil and Roman sittin’ in a tree, F-U-C-K-I-N-G!”</p><p>“Joan, seriously, shut up!”</p><p>“I totally ship it!”</p><p>“Joan, Virgil!” My head snaps up. Dr. Picani is looking at us with a twinkle of amusement in his eyes, “Will you please keep it down?”</p><p>My blush intensifies, “Sorry.” I mumble.</p><p>Joan lowers their voice, “So am I right? Do you have a crush on Roman?”</p><p>“Of course not. Don’t be ridiculous. And how do you know if I even like boys?”</p><p>Joan pauses their taunts, “Oh yeah, sorry. I just kinda assumed that you might be gay. My gaydar went through the roof when I met you.”</p><p>I sigh, “It’s fine, and I guess you're right. I am gay.”</p><p>Wait what? What the hell did I just say? Did I just come out to Joan. No, no, no, no no no no no no no no. This can’t be happening. Okay okay, calm down, you can’t panic now!</p><p>“Umm, are you okay?” Joan asks, sounding concerned.</p><p>“Yeah, but I didn’t really mean to tell you that… do mind not telling anyone?”</p><p>“Don’t worry,” they reassure me, “Your secret’s safe.”</p><p>I look at them gratefully. They smile back.</p><p>…Later That Day… </p><p>I knock on Patton’s door, “Hey Pat? Could you help me with something?”</p><p>I hear hushed voices and shuffling on the other side, then Patton opens the door. His hair is a mess and his cardigan that he always wears is nowhere to be found.</p><p>“What is it kiddo?”</p><p>“Oh umm, I just need a ride over to Roman’s. He’s been a little off today, and I need help with one of our assignments.”</p><p>“Uhhh, sure. Do you need to go right now or…?”</p><p>“Yeah.”</p><p>“Okay, um, Logan?” Patton calls behind him and I hear Logan respond, “If you are implying that I should take him back to my house, then I will take him.”</p><p>Logan grabs his book bag and we walk down the stairs and out the front door, but when we’re about to leave, Patton comes running out of the house.</p><p>“Wait Logan! You forgot this!” Patton hands him a bag of cookies.</p><p>Logan rolls his eyes, “Really, how many times do I have to tell you that cookies rot your teeth!”</p><p>Patton giggles, “Just take them!”</p><p>Logan rolls his eyes again, but I can see a hint of a smile on his face.</p><p>We leave Patton’s house and drive in an awkward silence.</p><p>“So umm, you and Patton huh?” I ask, trying to break the tension.</p><p>Logan makes an extra sharp turn, “‘Patton and I’.” He corrects, “And are you asking if we are dating?”</p><p>“Um yeah.”</p><p>“No. We are not, in fact, dating.”</p><p>“Suuuuure.”</p><p>“Why? Do you ‘ship’ us?”</p><p>I stifle a laugh. “You could say that I do. C’mon L! I saw Patton at the door! You guys were doing a little more than studying.”</p><p>“Um, okay. First of all my name is not L, it’s Logan. And second, I don’t know what gave you the impression that we are dating, we were just studying for the upcoming test.”</p><p>“Ugh! You're so frustrating sometimes! You know, it’s not terrible to have feelings.”</p><p>“Isn’t that a little hypocritical coming from you?”</p><p>I turn my head to look at him. “What do you mean?”</p><p>“Don’t act as if you don’t know Virgil. I’ve seen how you act, it’s not exceedingly difficult to spot an ‘emotion bottler’ as Patton so puts it.”</p><p>“I thought we were talking about you here.”</p><p>“That was never made clear.”</p><p>“Whatever.” We sit in silence the rest of the way, Logan’s tactics of shutting me down really seem to work.</p><p>When we pull into a driveway. I grab my computer from the backseat, and hop out of the car.</p><p>“Thanks for the ride.” I say as Logan opens the door.</p><p>“Your welcome. Roman should be in the basement, he usually likes to work out after his voice lessons.”</p><p>“K. Thanks.”</p><p>I’ve never been to Roman’s house before but I can figure out where most things are. If you’ve stayed in as many houses as I have, you get a general understanding of how they build them. That’s one of the only perks of moving around as much as I do.</p><p>My parents say that send me to different schools to get more experience with people. But I know it’s just because they want to be as far away from me as possible. So they arrange for me to stay with a new family each school year.</p><p>I stay at my house in Wisconsin during the summer, but even then I barely see my parents. They both work summer jobs. It’s been this way since I was in the sixth grade. When I came out as gay. They were the only ones that knew, but that was the first year that I went to a different school.</p><p>It hurts, knowing that they would rather have me across the country, then meet a boyfriend. But that’s kind of how it’s always been.</p><p>I shake my head, clearing away unwanted thoughts, and find the stairs leading down to the basement.</p><p>I hear the sound of a treadmill and I push open the heavy wooden door.</p><p>Roman is running with his ear buds in. He seems to be humming along as well. Don’t ask me how he’s doing it, but somehow he’s humming, while running.</p><p>He notices me by the door and slows down the speed until it stops.</p><p>“Hey Virge! Is it five o’clock already? I must have lost track of time.”</p><p>I wasn’t paying attention to anything he was saying because I had just realized that he was shirtless. My mouth suddenly becomes very dry.</p><p>“Virge? Virgil? Surly Temple?”</p><p>I snap my eyes away from his chest. “What?”</p><p>“Are you okay? You were zoning out there.”</p><p>I clear my throat, “Oh, I’m fine. I was just thinking.”</p><p>“Okayyyy… do you want to work on the writing piece?”</p><p>“Yeah, we can start.”</p><p>“Alright, just let me shower and change. Can you wait in the living room?”</p><p>“Sure.” I walk back up the stairs, and find the living room.</p><p>Soon Roman comes back up the stairs in a sweatshirt and wet hair. Great. Here comes the gay. I’m not going to deny that he’s hot. Okay fine. He’s really, really hot.</p><p>Surprise, surprise. I seem to have a hard time focusing on the project. My eyes are always being drawn to the person beside me. It’s actually annoying. He should not be allowed to look this good! Jesus Christ! Like, what the hell? Why can’t I look like that?!</p><p>Roman seems to notice that I’m a little off because he calls it quits only an hour in. By the time I call Patton to pick me up, Roman’s hair is still not dry and the gay panic is kicking in. Great.</p><p>And the dashing smile he gave me when I left didn’t help.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Hope you enjoyed! Constructive criticism, and kudos are welcome!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0007"><h2>7. Blackmail</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Hello beautiful humans! Okay, so this is a very angsty chapter I almost couldn't write it. But it is a key one.</p><p>The self harm in this chapter is of my own experience. So if it's not exactly like what you've experienced (if you have at all, if not I'm proud of you) please don't come after me. I don't know why, but I'm just really worried that people will. I've seen people do it with other stories and I just don't want that to happen to me.</p><p>Anyway, I'm ranting. Enjoy the chapter!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Roman</span>
  <span>’s POV</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>After Virgil left I locked myself in my room.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I could tell that Virgil was a little off. He was so distracted. Like he didn’t want to be there, or he’d rather be somewhere else. He also seemed in a hurry to leave.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Maybe it was something I did.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He seemed kind of annoyed with me the whole time. Yes, it was definitely something I did.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Shit!</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>It was because of the slime thing!</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He doesn’t trust me anymore! Great. Just great. I had to go and fuck a perfectly good friendship! Ughhh! Fuck!</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>My breathing gets faster and sharper as I spiral further and further into depressing thoughts.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I grope around my bedside table and my hand closes on a blade. I roll up my sleeves and place the blade on my exposed skin.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I take a deep breath and drag across my arm over and over again. I watch, almost mesmerized, as my blood spills out of the thin deep cuts.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I know I shouldn't be doing this but I couldn’t care less right now. I have been cutting like this since the night Remus blackmailed me. The stress got to me and this was the only way I knew how to deal with it. There are scars all down my arms and legs, even on my stomach.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I make a few more shallow cuts. By now my breath is starting to slow down. I put the blade back on the dresser and stand up.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I stumble over to my bathroom and brace myself on the sink. I take deep breaths in an attempt to stop the room from spinning. I’ve lost a lot of blood, or maybe it’s just the shock.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I get a tissue wet and try to soak up some of the blood running off my arms. I eventually manage to get my arms in makeshift toilet paper bandages.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I throw on a sweatshirt and climb back into bed. I glance at my clock, it’s only 6:26 pm, but I feel like it’s 1 am. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I know I'll hardly get any sleep, but there’s no harm in trying.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>…Two Days Later… </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Oh my god!</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Oh my god!</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>There up! </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The results are up!</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I have to tell Virgil. He’ll be excited. Plus talking to Virge is one of the only things that takes my mind off Remus' threat these days.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He isn't acting annoyed with me now, so maybe it wasn't something I did…  </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I flop down on my bed, hopefully he’ll be up by now. It’s six thirty, we have school soon.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>Sir Sing-a-Lot: Virge! There up! The auditions!</b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>Emo_Nightmare: great! good luck!</b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>Sir Sing-a-Lot: He posted them online! This is a first. Whew here we go!</b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I open the link that was sent to me by mail. Crossing my fingers I look at the roll for Prince Naveen. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Please,please, please! </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>This is my dream roll!</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Oh.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>Emo_Nightmare: well? did you get it?</b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>Sir Sing-a-Lot: you know there’s always other shows.</b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>Emo_Nightmare: oh… roman I'm sorry.</b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>Sir Sing-a-Lot: And maybe I’ll get a role in that one.</b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>Emo_Nightmare: r u okay?</b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>Sir Sing-a-Lot: Of course!</b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>Emo_Nightmare: but r u really?</b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>Sir Sing-a-Lot: Never better!</b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>Sir Sing-a-Lot: ‘Cause I just got the part! Rehearsals start next week!</b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>Emo_Nightmare: Roman! Jesus Christ! You fricking scared me! I thought you actually didn’t get the part!</b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>Sir Sing-a-Lot: Here’s the link: ______________</b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>Emo_Nightmare: okay, i believe u. But don’t do that again Princey.</b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>Sir Sing-a-Lot: Princey?</b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>Emo_Nightmare: ur a prince now right. it seems fitting.</b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>Emo_Nightmare: and i’m changing ur contact name.</b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>Princey: Great. But it’s only fair that yours is changed too. Hang on… </b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>Princey: there you go</b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>Sunshine: sunshine? Really?</b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>Princey: It describes your persona perfectly.</b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>Sunshine: why thank u.</b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>Princey: Whatever emo.</b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>Sunshine: wait a minute… </b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>Princey: What?</b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>Sunshine: check the role for Dr. Facilier.</b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>Princey: Janus.</b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>Sunshine: yeah.</b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>Princey: R u okay?</b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>Sunshine: yeah, im just a little worried for u. he’s very manipulative.</b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I feel my face heat up. Virgil cares about me. Actually cares about me. I’ll try to block out the little voice in my head that tells me otherwise.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>Princey: Oh please! I live with Remus. I can handle manipulative. </b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>Sunshine: speaking of remus… </b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>Sunshine: what’s the secret.</b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Shit.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>Princey: I can’t exactly reveal that. I’m sorry.</b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>Sunshine: you don’t really seem to like your brother. why would you keep a secret for him after he betrayed you?</b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>Princey: We are still brothers, and I still care about him.</b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>Sunshine: whatever you say… anyway, i need to get ready for school. See you later Princey.</b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>Princey: Farewell Sunshine.</b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>Sunshine: 🙄 bye</b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>...</span>
  <span>At School… </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Hey Princey.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I turn. Virgil walking up behind me.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Hey Virge.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I fall into step beside him as we walk to Picani’s class.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Can I ask you something?” He asks, turning his head to look at me.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I shrug, “Shoot.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Can you come over later and finish the project with me?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I slap my forehead, “Oh shit! I totally forgot! Sorry Virge!”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“No, your good. I was just hesitant to ask.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Okay, what time?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Four?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Sure.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>We reach the classroom and go to our seats. As Picani starts talking I notice Remus staring at me.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I turn around to glare at him, but he just gives me a cocky triumphant look, knowing he’s backed me into a corner.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I suddenly feel sick to the stomach. My own brother is so messed up that he would  blackmail his own brother into lying for him.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I raise my hand.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Yes, Roman?” Dr. Picani asks.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Can I go to the nurse?” I ask, clutching my stomach. Surprisingly I actually feel like I need to throw up.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Go ahead.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I practically sprint from the room. I have no actual intention of going to the nurse. He would do nothing but hand me an ice pack.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I can feel my throat closing up. I need to get out of here. Need to get out of these walls.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I race down the stairs to the front door. Outside of our school is a line of trees and beyond that, a hill with a valley.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I head there, crossing the parking lot. I stumble up the slope and through the line of trees, desperate for air.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I reach the top, and instantly the rest of my breath is taken. This view never ceases to amaze me.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The hill slopes down into a green meadow. Cutting through the valley is a thin creak, and beyond that is a scenic wood.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I lay down at the top of the hill, my face pointed at the sky. Closing my eyes, I breathe deeply, steadying my beating heart.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>It’s so peaceful up here, only the sound of birds chirping, water trickling, and wind blowing through the grass.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Ohhh Romaaaaannnn!”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>And my twin brother. Great.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I open my eyes and sit up. “What do you want Remus?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Remus walks up to me, “Oh I just wanted to make sure you were sticking to your end of the bargain.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I grit my teeth, “Of course I am.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Well keep up the good work. We wouldn’t want everyone to know your secret, would we?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I glared daggers at him. Wishing with all my heart that I had a mace to knock him over the head with. Remus just laughs and struts away. “Goodbyeeeee Romannnnn!”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I let out a long sigh and slump back to the ground. What am I going to do?</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“So, how much of what you told me was a lie?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I shoot up again. Virgil is standing in front of me, with his arms crossed.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I rub the back of my neck. “Virge! Umm heyyy, what are you doing here?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Don’t play games Roman! What was that about?” He demands.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I stay silent and try to think up another lie.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“The truth this time!”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I look helplessly at him. “I wish I could tell you.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>But Virgil’s pacing now, “He said he knew a secret of yours. And he said make sure that you stuck to your end of the bargain.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Oh my god! Roman! Did he fucking blackmail you into going to the lazer tag game! It wasn’t him who had a secret, it was you!”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I hesitate, then nod.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“What else did he use blackmail to do? And what’s the bargain? Roman! Answer me.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>My tongue feels stuck to the roof of my mouth, “I’m sorry Virgil, I can’t.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Virgil throws up his arms, “Well how am I supposed to help then!?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You could just sit down.” I suggest.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The anger seems to leave him, and he deflates like a balloon. “Alright.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>We sit on the edge of the hill and stare out at the sight in front of us. I try to focus on that, but /</span>
  <em>
    <span>someone</span>
  </em>
  <span>/ keeps distracting me. I’m sure he doesn't mean it. But how can Virgil not know how good he looks with wind whipping through his hair. Ughh! It’s not fair!</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I’m finally starting to relax when I feel something push on my back. I lose my balance and go somersaulting down the hill. When I come to a halt I’m covered in bruises and grass stains.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I look up and glare at Virgil who’s standing at the top of the hill, doubled over in laughter. I roll my eyes. But there’s a tiny smile on my face as he runs down to me, tears in his eyes.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Ha ha. Very funny Virge.” I say.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I guess you could say you’ve… fallen for me.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I snort at his pun. But I know I'm blushing. Because he’s right. I have.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Wait… </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Fuck.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I have.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I’ve fallen for Virgil.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Shit.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>What am I going to do!?</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I’m utterly fucked.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I’m pulled from my thoughts by Virgil jumping the small creek.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“C’mon Princey! Jump. Or are you too scared.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I, of course, can never back down from a challenge. So I back up and take a running leap.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I make it across and land, if I dare say, gracefully.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Virgil rolls his eyes, “Show off.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I smirk, “I think you're just jealous.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Pfft. Jealous of you? As if! You should be the one jealous of me.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Virgil takes off running through the grass, and I have no choice but to sprint after him. He leads me to the woods and disappears inside.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I run in too, but somehow I’ve lost him. Great. Now we’re playing hide and seek. I stop and scan the bushes. No Virgil. Huh. How could he hide that fast?</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I hear a rustling sound above my head and I look up, just in time to see a black and purple blur fall from the sky.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I collapse to the ground, bashing my arm on a stone. Ouch. I lift my head. Virgil is sprawled across my back shaking with laughter.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Virgil!” I yell, “That actually hurt!” I push him off me and stand up.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Oh please, Princey I wasn't even that high up!”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I cross my arms, “It still hurt.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He gives me a look, “Fine! Sorry.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Thank you!” I turn up my chin.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You have such an ego.” Virgil mumbles, shaking his head.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Excuse me!?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He ignores me. “Hey, do you want to learn how to climb trees?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I nervously look up at the oak trees surrounding us, “I’ll stay on the ground, thank you.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>But Virgil isn’t giving up that easily, “C’mon Princey! Just do it.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Unfortunately, I find it quite hard to say no to the emo. So that’s how I ended up ten feet in the air on a very unstable branch.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Virgil! Virgil what did you make me do! Get me down.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Virgil looks down at me from further up the tree, “Here, just put your foot there…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I put my foot on the notch that he pointed to.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Now grab my hand, and I’ll pull you up.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Are you sure?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Yes!” He sounded exasperated, “I'm sure, just do it!”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He reaches down and I grab his hand. He pulls me onto his branch with surprising strength.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Thanks Vir-”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Suddenly we’re face to face. I stop mid-sentence. We’re so close, I could just lean forward and-</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>No!</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I turn my head away quickly. “So how do we get down?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Virgil laughs. He leads me down and I refuse to look at him the whole way. Due to the embarrassing color my face is currently.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>We walk back across the field. When we get to the creek, instead of jumping it, I take off my shoes and socks.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“What are you doing?” Virgil asks.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I shrug, “Just dipping my feet in.” I sit down on the edge of a large rock and dangle my feet in the water. Virgil joins me and we sit in silence for some time.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I know we should be in class right now, but I couldn’t care less. And I don’t think Virgil cares either.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I watch as tiny minnows circle my legs. They’re tiny tails tickle my feet.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>You know. Minnows are a lot like people.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Wait hear me out on this one!</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>They approach you curiously, they trust that you won't hurt them. But as soon as you make the slightest moment, the slightest sign that you might do something to them, they scatter. You broke their trust.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>That’s how I see it at least.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>They also seem grey and dull at first. But when the sunlight hits them just right. You can see the tints of different colors that make them diverse. Like everyone on this planet. Everyone seems the same at first, but when you look closer you can see differences that make us unique.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I sigh, wishing things were easier. If I could just come out of the closet, this whole situation could be avoided. Maybe I should just suck it up and call the police. But I just can't. I’m not ready.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I'm stuck.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>And the only way out is the way I don’t want to go.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>…3:45… </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I’m on my way to Virgil’s for the project now.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>My mom said I could use her car. Which is a rare occurrence. I have my license but she never lets me drive. I always walk or get a ride to school.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I plug in the aux cord and put my playlist on shuffle. It’s a musical playlist. Obviously.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Apparently the first song is Say My Name. One of my favorites. I hum along. The next song is Waving Through a Window. And I just sing at the top of my lungs. I’m in the middle of the second verse when it happens.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The car in front of me swerves to the right. My eyes widen, as it hits the car next to me.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>A heavy weight hits the side of my car and then next thing I know the airbags go up. I bash my head on one of them and everything goes dark.</span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Thanks for reading!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0008"><h2>8. Memories</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Hello wonderful Fandors! So here's the next chapter, TW: some harmful language that might be distressing. After this I'm going to be taking a mental heath break, just because I haven't been in the best state right now. The next chapter might be a little shorter so, yeah... enjoy.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Virgil’s POV</p><p>I glance at the clock.</p><p>3:50.</p><p>Princey should be here soon. I grab my laptop from my room and set it up on the coffee table in the living room. The project we’re working on is for Dr. Picani’s writing class. We’re basically putting a spin on Harry Potter. Making it gayer. After what J.K. Rowling said, we’re going to make more than half of the characters transgender.</p><p>But honestly, this is just my excuse to write more fanfiction. (Don’t tell anyone.)</p><p>I glance up at the clock again.</p><p>3:55.</p><p>It’s not like I’m nervous to hang out because I have a massive crush on him or anything. It’s just that Roman’s usually a punctual person. I shouldn’t worry too much, he probably just got caught up in traffic. </p><p>I open the computer and go over what we had written before, we’re just rewriting the first book for now. And it seems that we only got to the part where Harry enters Diagon Alley with Hagrid. Great. We have a whole lot more to do.</p><p>I know I’m complaining. But I guess I don’t really mind. I mean, the more time spent on this project means the more time spent with Princey. And I definitely don’t mind that.</p><p>He’s a really, really hot dude. And I’m a really, really gay dude.</p><p>But the thing is. He’s a really, really straight dude as well. He even said so. So I’m screwed. Because I’ve undoubtedly developed a crush on Roman.</p><p>Great. What is my problem? I always fall for straight guys.</p><p>And the one time I fell for a gay guy… well. Things happened. Bad things.</p><p>… One Year Ago… </p><p>“Yo Valerie!” I yell running up to a girl with long brown hair. </p><p>“Hey Virge.” She says as I catch up. “What’s new my dude?”</p><p>“Nothing, I just wanted to say hey.”</p><p>She shrugs, “Alright. Hey, do you want to join Talyn and I for lunch?”</p><p>“Sure.”</p><p>“Lit! Also, do you need help on that math assignment? Mr. Phillips needs it in by tomorrow.”</p><p>“Actually I fin-”</p><p>I stop mid sentence, and stare ahead. It’s Janus. He’s walking toward us. If you don’t know who Janus is, he’s this really hot, really gay guy. The one I happen to have a huge crush on. I’ve barely ever talked to him before. But here he is standing in front of me.</p><p>“Hello Virgil.”</p><p>I clear my throat and attempt to hide my blush. “Hey Janus. Uhh, is there anything you need?”</p><p>Valerie snickers beside me.</p><p>“I actually wanted to ask you something.”</p><p>I shrug, “Go ahead.”</p><p>Janus smirks, “Will you go on a date, with me?”</p><p>My heart stops. I gape at him open mouthed. “What?”</p><p>“Will you, Virgil Lilith go on a date with me?”</p><p>“Umm…”</p><p>Suddenly Janus smacks his forehead, “My apologies Virgil, I just assumed you were gay.”</p><p>Janus begins to walk away, but I can’t let this chance pass. My crush just asked me out!</p><p>“Wait!”</p><p>Janus turns.</p><p>“I’d love to go.”</p><p>He gives me a small smile, “Meet me by the back steps after school.”</p><p>As soon as he’s out of sight Valarie starts squealing. “Oh my god! Virge you’ve had a crush on him for so long! I ship you two sooooo much! We need to think of a ship name!”</p><p>“Shut up!” I hiss as we enter the cafeteria and sit down.</p><p>Talyn looks up from their book questioningly. I roll my eyes, “Fine Valarie you can tell them.”</p><p>Valarie launches into explication, telling Talyn everything that happened. But I’m not paying attention, I’m staring across the lunch room at the guy who just asked me out on a date.</p><p>I can’t wait for tonight!</p><p>… </p><p>I walk around the back of the school. The steps come in sight, but Janus isn’t there. I shrug and sit down, I’ll wait.</p><p>I open my phone and click on Tik Tok, I haven’t been on it for a while. So I should probably see what’s trending now.</p><p>I’m scrolling past a giant blue duck when my vision is suddenly cut off. I’m about to whip around and punch whoever just put their hands over my eyes whenI hear a voice.</p><p>“Guess who?”</p><p>I sigh, “Janus?”</p><p>“Of course not.” Janus says, sitting down beside me.</p><p>I roll my eyes, even though I’m blushing, “I didn’t peg you as the type to do that.”</p><p>He looks somewhat embarrassed when he says, “So, do you want to go for coffee?”</p><p>“That sounds too mellow and simple for a person like you.”</p><p>Janus raises an eyebrow, “Alright, fine. Challenge accepted. C’mon, I know just the place. And we don’t have to drive there or take a Taxi, if you're too uncomfortable with that.”</p><p>I smile, grateful that he considered the fact that I might not be comfortable riding in a car with him.</p><p>He grabs my wrist and pulls me up from where we’re sitting. “Let's go then.”</p><p>Janus leads me down a narrow alleyway behind the school and across a field. We walk along a sidewalk until we reach a small building.</p><p>“What’s this?” I ask. The building is grey and boring, “I thought this wasn’t supposed to be simple.”</p><p>Janus smirks, “And it’s not. This place is called Mounds Theater.”</p><p>“So you took me to see a movie?” I ask, unimpressed.</p><p>“Not exactly. It’s not open today.”</p><p>“Then what are we doing here?”</p><p>“You’ll see.”</p><p>Janus walks around the back of the theater. I watch as he opens a door labeled, ‘Stage Entrance’.</p><p>“Janus what are you doing!” I hiss. “It’s closed.”</p><p>“Your right, that’s what makes it fun.” He slips inside and I have no choice but to follow him.</p><p>The door slams shut behind us and the room is thrown into darkness. I inhale sharply. I know it sounds childish but I’m scared of the dark. I feel my breathing start to speed up. Shit. I’m going to have a panic attack. Right here. In front of Janus. On a date. Shit.</p><p>As my thoughts spiral downward, I feel a hand close around mine. “Shhh. Virgil, listen to my voice.”</p><p>I focus on Janus.</p><p>“Don’t worry, you're safe, I won’t let anything happen to you.”</p><p>I take a deep breath and I feel myself starting to calm down.</p><p>“It’s okay. You're here with me. You're safe.”</p><p>He squeezes my hand, and I’m almost glad that it’s dark, so he can’t see my blush.</p><p>“Are you okay?”</p><p>I take one last deep breath, “Yeah, yeah I'm okay.”</p><p>“Good, because I brought a flashlight.” I hear the zip of a school bag and then a click as the flashlight turns on.</p><p>I look around, we seem to be in some sort of backstage area. It’s very dusty as it seems like it hasn’t been used in a while.</p><p> It’s filled with all sorts of props and backdrops.</p><p>“Looks like we’re in the prop room.” I say examining a glass rose. “Janus, why are we even here?”</p><p>He shrugs, “I thought it might be fun.”</p><p>“To break into a theater?”</p><p>“A haunted theater.”</p><p>“What?”</p><p>“You heard me.” Janus put’s the flashlight under his face, ghost story style. “They say that three ghosts haunt Mounds Theater. The one we’re trying to contact is Red: the one who worked the projector. Legend says he jumped off of the balcony trying to impress his crush.”</p><p>I roll my eyes, “You don’t actually believe this, do you?”</p><p>Janus nods, “And you will too, after today. Come one.”</p><p>I follow him out of the prop room and onto the stage. Everything’s still dark, and Janus is still holding my hand.</p><p>“I’m going to look for the light switch.” He says and hands me the flashlight.</p><p>I draw my sweatshirt tighter, and I pull my hood up. The flashlight provides a little comfort but I’m still a little scared.</p><p>Suddenly, I hear something clatter to the ground behind me. I whip around.</p><p>There’s nothing there but a broom.</p><p>“Janus was that you?”</p><p>I hear a yell from somewhere above me, “Was what me?”</p><p>I pull my hoodie even closer to me. “Nothing.”</p><p>“Are you okay?”</p><p>“Yeah. I’m good.”</p><p>“Look I found it!”</p><p>The light that comes on is blinding. I have to cover my eyes. When I finally open them again, I see that I'm in the middle of the stage. I look out at the hundreds of red chairs in the audience. I imagine people sitting in all of those chairs and it makes me dizzy. How could anyone be a performer? Everyone staring at me would not be fun.</p><p>I look up. Janus is standing on the balcony staring at me.</p><p>I tilt my head, “What?”</p><p>He smiles, “It’s just that face you make. It’s adorable.”</p><p>My face goes cherry red, “Shut up.” I mumble.</p><p>He smirks, “I actually wanted to try something. It’s been done before, but I can’t hurt to try again.”</p><p>“Go ahead I guess.”</p><p>Janus swings his foot onto the railing of the balcony. And then his other one. I suddenly realize what he’s going to do.</p><p>“Wait! JANUS NO-”</p><p>Janus leaps off and it seems as if everything is going in slow motion. I watch in horror as he does a flip in mid air.</p><p>I scream.</p><p>He’s going to die!</p><p>But he lands gracefully on the stage right next to me with little more than a thump.</p><p>I stare, open mouthed at him, “How did you do that!?”</p><p>He shrugs, “It’s not that high. Red must’ve landed on his head.”</p><p>“Why would you even try that!?”</p><p>“The same reason Red did: to impress my crush.”</p><p>“Smooth motherfucker.”</p><p>Janus chuckles, “So are you impressed?”</p><p>“Maybe.”</p><p>“I’ll count that as a win then.”</p><p>I roll my eyes. It’s then that I realize how close we are. And it seems that Janus does too.</p><p>He gently takes my chin and lifts it up. (I hate that I’m several inches shorter than him.)</p><p>“Did anyone ever tell you how beautiful you are?” He whispers.</p><p>I’m speechless, and if it’s possible my flush deepens. He leans in, closer and closer, and I know what’s about to happen.</p><p>“Can I kiss you Virgil?”</p><p>Without hesitation I reach up and kiss him, hard. His eyes widen in surprise; he thought he had the upper hand.</p><p>I reach my hands up and tagle them in his hair. Janus’s arms snake around my waist. He bites my bottom lip and I let out a small huff. He smirks against my lips.</p><p>I pull away embarrassed. We’re both panting.</p><p>Janus recovers first, “Damn Virgil, how many people have you kissed?”</p><p>“Umm, just you?”</p><p>“Shit, you’re good.”</p><p>“Really?”</p><p>“Of course.”</p><p>I smile, “Hey, you wanna go hunt that ghost?”</p><p>Janus laughs, “Let’s go.”</p><p>… </p><p>We dated for months. Until the day I had to leave.</p><p>… </p><p>“Janus… there’s something I need to tell you.”</p><p>We’re sitting on a bench at the park, luckily we’re the only ones here, so we can talk in private.</p><p>“What it is, love?” He asks, turning and kissing me on the cheek.</p><p>I screw my eyes shut. “We need to break up.”</p><p>Janus pulls away sharply, “What?!”</p><p>I take a deep breath, “It’s not you. It’s me.”</p><p>Janus scowls, “I’ve heard that before Virgil, try again.”</p><p>My shoulders slump. “It’s actually my parents, I'm uhh… I'm moving.”</p><p>“Your what!?”</p><p>“I’m moving.”</p><p>Janus’ eyes flare with anger, “And you didn’t think to tell me until now!?”</p><p>“Well I- I knew you wouldn’t take it well.”</p><p>“You think! Jesus Virgil! I could have prepared myself mentally for this if you had told me earlier!”</p><p>My head falls into my hands, “Janus, don’t. I’m sorry. I already feel bad enough.”</p><p>“You are literally my everything. You can’t just go!”</p><p>“I don’t really have a choice Jan!”</p><p>Janus gets up and starts pacing, “But you could have told me! I could’ve spent more time with you.”</p><p>“My parents-”</p><p>My protests go unnoticed as Janus continues his rant.</p><p>“Virgil! How could you go and pull this shit! You can’t just leave! I need you! Please don't go!”</p><p>I hang my head, “I’m sorry Janus. I have to.”</p><p>I look up in time to see his eyes harden with anger. “Fine. Fine. Leave, see if I care.” He pauses, then continues in a venomous tone, “I wasn’t going to tell you this, but I was dared to go on a date with you. It was my friends, they wanted to make fun of you, and I did too.”</p><p>My eyes widen in shock, and I can feel my heart breaking into a thousand tiny pieces.</p><p>“I felt guilty, so I tried to convince myself to love you. I tried to fool myself into it. It obviously didn’t work. And I can’t believe you fell for it! Your so stupid! Have I ever said ‘I love you’? Think back Virgil. Have I?”</p><p>I think about all of the times we’d been together, and he’s right. He never said ‘I love you.’ Not once. I can feel tears pricking the corners of my eyes.</p><p>“Your’s so fucking dumb. No one could ever love you! Not when you run away from them! You freak! You absolute freak!”</p><p>I watch helplessly as Janus spins on his heel and walks away. Leaving me to cry silently on the bench.</p><p>My heart hurts.</p><p>It hurts so much.</p><p>…End of Flashback... </p><p>Things with Janus didn’t end well. As much as I hate to admit it, he definitely left me with trust issues. Probably for life.</p><p>But now there’s Roman.</p><p>And I have no idea what to do. He seems like a really nice guy, but so did Janus. I don’t even know anymore. Things are all jumbled now, especially with him being blackmailed by Remus.</p><p>My thoughts are interrupted by Patton’s parent (Jordan) bursting into the room.</p><p>“Come quick! Roman’s in the hospital!”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Thanks for reading! Comments/kudos/constructive criticism are always welcome.</p><p>I also have some big news! I recently came out to my family as non-binary/genderflux! Yay! I told them my preferred name, Quinn, and my preferred pronouns, they/them or he/him.</p><p>They were really supportive, and I feel lucky. My heart goes out to those who don't have the most accepting people in the world, and I want you to know that you're not alone.</p><p>Anyway, thank you all for continuing to read my story! It means a lot to know that people like my work. Sorry, I'm getting sentimental right now. Have a good day/night/whatever!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0009"><h2>9. The (very cliché and overdone by every other author) Hospital Visit</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Okay, I'm sorry. This chapter is very, very, angsty. It's like I took the angst bucket labeled: 'use sparingly' and just frickin dumped on this chapter. I apologize, and good luck!</p><p>TW: Cutting mentions and scars, suicide attempt, slight panic attack</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Virgil’s POV</p><p>I spring to my feet. “What!?”</p><p>Jordan beckons me and I run out of the room.</p><p>“We’re going to the hospital. I’ll explain on the way there.” They say as we climb into the car. Patton is already in the passenger seat.</p><p>Jordan puts the car into drive and shoots out of the driveway.</p><p>“Renny! Slow down!” Patton says, “We don’t want to end up like Roman!”</p><p>Jordan sighs, “Your right.” The car slows down but I don’t care.</p><p>“What happened to Princey!” I demand.</p><p>Patton and Jordan look at each other and then back at me, “He got into a car crash.” Patton says, hesitantly.</p><p>The world seems to stop. I can’t believe it. Roman, my Roman, got into a car crash.</p><p>I feel the palms of my hands start to sweat, and the car seems to spin in front of my eyes. I grip the seat so hard that I see my knuckles turn white. I will not let myself have a panic attack. Not now.</p><p>Roman needs me. I can't panic.</p><p>I come back to the present to see Patton staring at me, “Are you okay Virge?”</p><p>I nod silently, not trusting my voice.</p><p>“Alright. Just hold tight; we’ll be there soon.”</p><p>We finally pull into the hospital parking lot after what seems like 10,000 years. I jump out of the car and practically sprint to the front doors, Patton and Jordan close behind me.</p><p>Jordan asks the receptionist where Roman is, we get the room number and go up to floor three.</p><p>There’s a small waiting room by the elevator, I see Reena, Kiko, and Logan sitting there. Reena and Kiko are holding hands and whispering to each other. And Logan is reading a magazine upside down.</p><p>Patton runs over to Logan and pulls him into a hug. Kiko spots Jordan.</p><p>“Oh, I’m so glad you're here!” She says. Jordan hugs her and Reena.</p><p>“How’s Roman doing?” They ask.</p><p>Reena sighs, “He has a broken arm, but other than that he’s okay. Thank god! He was caught in between two cars, luckily he was saved by the airbag. When he got to the hospital he was unconscious and in shock, but he’s okay now. He just has to stay here for a few days to make sure there isn’t any serious brain damage. He has a cast-”</p><p>“Can I go and see him. I’m sorry for interrupting but I need to know he’s okay.” I say.</p><p>Reena nods at me, “Sure, Remus is in there now. He was devastated to hear his twin was in the hospital.”</p><p>I tense up, Remus shouldn’t be anywhere near Roman! I say a quick thank you to Reena and walk down the hallway to Roman’s room. I press my ear to the door, and sure enough, there are voices.</p><p>“-oman! Stop lying to me! I saw you talking to Virgil! I know you told him something!”</p><p>“Remus, how many times do I have to tell you? I didn’t tell him anything. Please…”</p><p>Roman sounds tired. That frightens me. He’s supposed to be confident and upbeat. Not weak and timid.</p><p>I decide it’s time to intervene. I open the door and strut in, trying to imitate Roman’s usual ease.</p><p>“What didn’t he tell me?”</p><p>Remus whips around and is all up in my face in two seconds flat. “What did he tell you on the hill? He snarls.</p><p>I definitely glare back; I’m not about to reveal anything to him. “I was actually telling /him/ something.”</p><p>He narrows his eyes, “What?”</p><p>“I was telling him about my history with Janus.”</p><p>“Janus?” a flash of recognition flashes across Remus’ face but it’s gone as soon as it comes.</p><p>“Yes, Janus is my ex.”</p><p>I can see him searching my face for any signs of lies. I take all emotion off of my face and stare him down, stone cold.</p><p>He finally relents, believing my lie. Well, my /half lie/. “I’m warning you Roman, one toe out of line…”</p><p>Remus stalks out of the room and I watch him go, letting out a breath I didn’t know I was holding.</p><p>I rush over to Roman’s bedside. “Are you okay?”</p><p>He nods, “Thanks for that Virgil. I tried to deal with him, but…”</p><p>“I understand.” I look down at his cast, “How is it?”</p><p>He grimaces, “It hurts like a bitch. But at least I’m alive.”</p><p>“Yeah, at least you're alive.”</p><p>We sit in awkward silence until Roman says, “I suppose you’ll want to know what that was about.”</p><p>I shake my head, “If he’s blackmailing you, I don’t want to put your secrets in any more danger than they already are.”</p><p>He looks at me gratefully. “Thank you again, Virgil.”</p><p>I shrug, “Any time Princey. Hey, can I sign your cast?”</p><p>He laughs, “A little childish. But sure.”</p><p>I fish around my pocket for a sharpie and luckily I find one. (My pockets are like Mary Poppins’ bag.)</p><p>I write my name with a little storm cloud by it. I’m about to move away but something else catches my eye. He’s wearing short sleeves, and even though his cast is big I can still see some of his arms. And what’s on them.</p><p>I pull up his sleeve and gasp. Thin bloody scars are covering the entire thing.</p><p>Oh shit.</p><p>Fuck no!</p><p>I know what those are. I have the same ones.</p><p>I back away, “What the fuck Roman!”</p><p>He looks panicked but tries to hide it. “What?”</p><p>“What are those from.”</p><p>He pulls his sleeve back down, “The crash.” He avoids my gaze, so I know he’s lying.</p><p>“No. Roman, those are not from the crash, they’re too evenly placed. I’ll ask again: what are those from?”</p><p>He glares at me, “Nothing! And it’s none of your business anyway.”</p><p>“It is my business Roman! I care about you!” I'm practically yelling now.</p><p>“Sure.”</p><p>“What do you mean, ‘Sure’?” I say, wounded by his words.</p><p>“I mean, that you don’t actually care. It’s all an act. You're suspicious of me. And after that slime episode, you don’t trust me! I saw how you acted when you came over. You don’t care, you wanted to get out of my presence as soon as possible. It’s all a fucking act.</p><p>“Nobody sticks around. And when they do,they betray you. Break your trust and tell all your secrets! So it’s better not to care anyway.”</p><p>I stare at him, shocked, “Why would you think that! I trust you. Who I don’t trust is Remus. Roman, I care.”</p><p>His shoulders droop and he turns away.</p><p>I can feel my eyes welling up, “What more do I have to do to convince you that people care!? Logan cares, Patton cares, Jordan cares, I care.</p><p>“Roman… I need you. I’ve only known you for three months but it feels like I have forever. I don’t want to see you self harming, trust me, I’ve been there. I know what it’s like.”</p><p>Tears spill down my cheeks, “I know what it feels like to think that no one cares, that you're on your own. But you need to know that you're not. I’m here. I’m right here. Roman please… don't hurt yourself.”</p><p>I hear my voice break off, and I stare down at my hands.</p><p>“Roman, I don’t know what I would do if you were gone.”</p><p>...Roman’s POV…</p><p>“Roman, I don’t know what I would do if you were gone.”</p><p>My head shoots up and I turn back around. Virgil is staring down at his feet, and I can see tears splattering on the floor.</p><p>‘Roman, I don’t know what I would do if you were gone.’ Does he really mean that? The little voice in my head tells me to ignore him. But I don’t want to. I want to believe that he cares. I want to believe that I would be missed if I left.</p><p>But I just can’t. I can’t believe it.</p><p>So I don’t say anything. Instead I give him the cold shoulder.</p><p>He tries to get me to talk. Telling me again and again that I'm worth it. But I drive him away. </p><p>Right before the door closes, he turns and looks back at me, and I can see the cold hard anger in his eyes, “Don’t talk to me again. All I do is try and help, but you seem to be doing just fine on your own.”</p><p>… </p><p>When Reena and Kiko come into the hospital room, I wipe the tears off my face and pretend to be asleep. I just can't deal with them right now. Not even Logan, who's usually there for me, even if he doesn't really get feelings.</p><p>As they leave I feel the tears coming. They’re unstoppable.</p><p>I cry myself to sleep.</p><p>… </p><p>It’s been a few days, but I’m out of the hospital and back at school. It only took so long because they had to do some last minute checks. Thomas and Remy got me a cake that said ‘Thank god you didn't die’ to cheer me up. I have to say, it kind of did.</p><p>Although, Virgil is still ignoring me. Which kind of hurts, but oh well I guess.</p><p>As for theater, well, I can still play Prince Naveen, but it’s definitely going to be a challenge. I have to run around in a frog suit and a cast. Oh boy, this’ll be fun.</p><p>I’m still keeping an eye on Janus, just in case he tries anything. I’m not doing it for Virgil, I’m doing it for me.</p><p>“Mr. Sanders? Did you hear my question?”</p><p>My head snaps up. “What?”</p><p>Mr. Johnson is looking down at me with an unamused expression on his face, “Did you hear my question?”</p><p>I blink stupidly, “Sorry, what was it?”</p><p>Johnson lets out a long sigh, “Roman, will you please see me after class?”</p><p>I nod. Today is just great isn’t it?</p><p>After the class is over, Johnson comes up to me. “Roman, I’ve noticed that your grades are slipping. I know that you got into a car crash, but that does not excuse you from your school work. As your home room teacher as well as your science one, I might need to have a word with your parents.”</p><p>“Alright.” I say glumly.</p><p>“But, I want to give you a chance to explain yourself before I do so. Tonight, please talk to your mother and father about this, I’ll call them tomorrow.”</p><p>“Umm actually, it’s mother and mother.”</p><p>Johnson’s face changes instantly, from confused, to surprised, to looking like he smelled dog shit on the bottom of his shoe.</p><p>“Oh, well, talk to your lesbian mothers than.”</p><p>I feel anger bubbling up. “You could just say mothers you know.” I say mildly, trying not to get in a fight with my teachers.</p><p>“Well, I called them by what they are: lesbians. They’re different and weird.”</p><p>I feel my fists ball under my desk, he did not! How dare he insult my moms! “Yeah, and your a homophobic piece of shit, but I still don’t call you that do I?”</p><p>I’m seeing red by now, not caring what will happen.</p><p>I hear Johnson gasp, “Mr. Sanders! How dare you talk back like that.”</p><p>I’m breathing heavily now, “And how dare you insult people you have no knowledge about. You homophobic fuck!” I’m yelling by now.</p><p>“Enough!” Johnson’s eyes flare with anger, “Principal’s office! Now! I’m calling your lesbian mothers right now!”</p><p>I get up and start to leave him room. But I spin around and spit on the ground by his feet. Then I flee.</p><p>As I’m walking through the halls I see Remy come up to me. “Girl, you good? You seem a little crazy right now.”</p><p>“I’m fine.” I say tightly.</p><p>“You sure?”</p><p>“Of course I’m sure Remy!” I snap, “Just leave me alone!”</p><p>Remy looks wounded. So I take a deep breath and say, “I’m sorry for snapping. But I’m kinda stressed right now.”</p><p>Remy shrugs, satisfied with my apology, “You're all good. But you look like you could use some coffee.” He hands me a Starbucks drink and I stare at it.</p><p>“But how did you get this?” I hadn’t seen him carrying two before.</p><p>He winks, “Magic.”</p><p>I roll my eyes.</p><p>… </p><p>“Mr. Sanders. Thank you for coming to see me.”</p><p>I grit my teeth and nod at the principal.</p><p>“I want to know why you were talking back to your teacher and swearing at him. Explain.”</p><p>“Well, he called my mothers different and weird.”</p><p>Principal Henderson rubs her temples, “Roman, why would you blow up! Usually you're so level headed. And I know you, you’re a good student.”</p><p>“I’m not a good student if you insult a group of people whom you know nothing of!”</p><p>“But that’s no reason to call your teacher a ‘homophobic piece of…’!”</p><p>“Yes. He was being a homophobic piece of shit.”</p><p>“You know what! I’m done! Roman it doesn’t matter what he called your moms! You have no right to talk back.”</p><p>I glare daggers at her, “Too bad.” I can already tell she’s homophobic too.</p><p>“You're suspended.”</p><p>“Great.”</p><p>“For two days.”</p><p>I roll my eyes, “Does it look like I care?”</p><p>… </p><p>“Roman!” Kiko exclaims, “You said that!?”</p><p>I cross my arms and glare up at my mom. “Yes.”</p><p>“And you got suspended for it?”</p><p>“Yes.”</p><p>“Why?!”</p><p>I take a deep breath, “Mr. Johnson insulted you and mom.”</p><p>Kiko sighs and rubs her temples, “How many times have I told you Roman!? Don’t rise to the bait!”</p><p>I shrug, “He deserved it.”</p><p>Kiko looks absolutely done, “What’s gotten into you! To your room, don’t come out until your mother gets home.”</p><p>I slump to my room and fall on my bed. I know what’s ‘gotten into me’. Blackmail. And the fact that I hate myself for pushing Virgil away.</p><p>Everything's been going wrong lately, I have no friends, I have a broken arm, I’m suspended from school, and I’m being blackmailed into keeping a secret by my brother.</p><p>Maybe… </p><p>Maybe, this whole thing could be avoided if… no. No, I will not.</p><p>Think of Virgil, Roman! What would he think?</p><p>He wouldn’t care. You saw the way he left.</p><p>And what about Remy and Thomas?</p><p>I don’t know, they could probably deal.</p><p>And what about the play?</p><p>Who cares about a stupid play anyway.</p><p>But… that would be letting Remus win! And speaking of your brother! How would Logan react? And Kiko and Reena?</p><p>Badly. </p><p>Exactly. You can’t do it.</p><p>But… everything would be a lot better, a lot simpler if I did. All the pain would be away.</p><p>True… </p><p>Think about it! No more worry about Remus, no more pain of losing your friends, no more feelings, at all.</p><p>I suppose.</p><p>And I would be doing this for myself anyway, not other people, who cares about them anyway?</p><p>I know you do. I know you care.</p><p>But I don’t.</p><p>You do.</p><p>I don’t!</p><p>You do.</p><p>I DON’T!</p><p>You do.</p><p>I FUCKING DON’T CARE! I'M GOING TO DO IT.</p><p>I walk over to my window. I’m on the top floor of my house, and the fall looks like it would kill me. That’s what I want isn’t it? Maybe it’ll just injure me. But if I dived head first off… </p><p>I take a deep breath and open the window. I climb onto the window sill. Do I really want to do this? I’ve already made my decision. There’s no use crying about it.</p><p>I hear my door open behind me and I whip around.</p><p>Remus is standing there with a sneer on his face. When he sees me standing on the window sill, his expression turns to shock.</p><p>“What are you doing!?”</p><p>I glare at him, “What does it look like Einstein?”</p><p>He looks conflicted, like one part of him wants me to do this, while the other part doesn’t. “Why?”</p><p>“Why do you think?” I spit.</p><p>He crosses his arms, “I’m not sure that will do it, what about jumping out of a moving car?”</p><p>Turn away from him, “Whatever.”</p><p>All of a sudden, I don’t feel like jumping. Because jumping would be cowardly. And I’m anything but a coward. I’m a Gryffindor after all.</p><p>I carefully climb off the window, “Your right. Jumping out of a car would be better. Besides, I still want to perform in that play.”</p><p>Remus narrows his eyes, “Ha, good luck.” He turns on his heel and leaves my room, slamming the door behind him.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I'm cringing right now, this chapter is so fricking angsty, I'm sorry! Anyway, you survived. Good job.</p><p>It's also Joan appreciation day! SO GO GIVE SOME FUCKING LOVE TO THEM!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0010"><h2>10. Pizza Rolls and Mozzarella Sticks</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Okay, so sorry, but here's another angsty chapter. But it's okay cause it's not Roman angst........ it's Logan angst. Yay.... </p><p>Anyway TW: angst, slight panic attack sort of</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Virgil’s POV</p><p>Life’s great right now. It’s just amazing.</p><p>I literally have no friends. None. Well, besides Patton and Joan I guess. All of Roman’s friends are avoiding me. So, yeah, I’m just sitting here in my dark room being beat up by my anxiety with nothing to distract me from it.</p><p>/Yaaayy/.</p><p>I hear a knock on the door. “Come in.” I say, my voice is muffled by a pillow.</p><p>I hear the door open and the light switch on. “Are you alright kiddo?”</p><p>It’s Patton. I sit up and rub my sore eyes.</p><p>Patton sits down on my bed next to me. “I know you're going through a rough patch, so I made you some pizza rolls and mozzarella sticks to cheer you up.”</p><p>I smile a little despite my mood, “Not cookies?”</p><p>Patton laughs, “Don’t worry, I didn’t forget those.” He hands me a plate piled high with my favorite foods.</p><p>“Thanks.” I mumble.</p><p>“Do you want to talk about it?” He asks tentatively.</p><p>I shrug, “It’s nothing really.”</p><p>“Well, whatever it is, it’s uptown funking you up.”</p><p>I crack another smile. “Well…”</p><p>Patton puts a hand on my shoulder, “It’s okay, take your time kiddo.”</p><p>I fidget with a stray string on my hoodie, “I said some things I shouldn't have and now Roman’s ignoring me.”</p><p>“Keep going.” Patton says earnestly, “It helps to get things out.”</p><p>I decide to tell Patton everything, “I followed Roman out behind the school one day, and I found out that Remus blackmailed Roman into going to the laser tag game. So that he could pull a really childish prank. Then Remus said: ‘just making sure you stick to your end of the deal, we wouldn’t want everyone to know your secret, would we?’ Roman looked really scared. So I’m sure that there’s more to it than Remus just blackmailing him for a prank.</p><p>“And then when Roman was in the hospital I saw Remus yelling at Roman because he saw me talking to him, but I defended him. When Remus left Roman offered to tell me his secret but I told him ‘no’, cause I didn’t want to put him in more danger from his brother.”</p><p>The next part is the hardest part to retell.</p><p>“Then Roman asked why I cared, and I tried to convince him that I do, well, did. But then he just shut me out. And so- so I said, ‘Don’t talk to me again. All I do is try and help, but you seem to be doing just fine on your own.’”</p><p>I can feel the tears coming, they spill down my face like a waterfall.</p><p>“Patton I actually said that! I knew how much pain he was in and I said that.”</p><p>“Shh, it’s okay kiddo.” Patton pulls me into his arms, and I start shaking and crying into his shoulder.</p><p>“It’s okay, it’ll be okay.”</p><p>“But it won’t be.” I mumble into his shirt, “I hurt him, and I can’t forgive myself.”</p><p>Patton stiffens, “I know you can Virge, you have to.”</p><p>Patton lets go of me and starts rolling up one of his pant legs. “Bad things happen when you don’t forgive yourself.”</p><p>My eyes widen when I see thin long scars running up Patton’s leg all the way to his knee. “Patton…” I whisper. “Tell me you didn’t…”</p><p>Patton nods solemnly, “I did. It was a long time ago, but I did. I got a therapist and learned to forgive myself.”</p><p>A memory flashes in front of my eyes: Roman’s arm covered in thin scars just like the ones on Patton’s legs. But these ones are still bloody. </p><p>I gasp. “What?” Patton asks.</p><p>“Roman…” I say. I can feel my heart rate speed up, and my palms are sweating. “He had those… he had scars.”</p><p>I can see the shock on Patton’s face.</p><p>I can’t let myself panic, not now. I take a deep, steady breath. “He had self harm scars.”</p><p>“That’s it.” Patton says, picking up his phone. “I’m calling someone!”</p><p>“Who?” </p><p>“Logan.”</p><p>Logan’s POV</p><p>I jump when my phone starts ringing, I am currently working on a school project and it happened to surprise me.</p><p>I pick up the phone and read the contacts, it’s Patton.</p><p>“Salutations Patton,” I say.</p><p>“Hey Lo, I have a question.” Patton's voice says.</p><p>“What is it?”</p><p>“Could you come over?” He sounds agitated.</p><p>I glance down at my project. “I don’t see why not.” Whatever Patton needs is probably more important than my project.</p><p>Wow. I did not ever expect to be thinking those words. I suppose nothing is more important than school.</p><p>Except Patton.</p><p>“Great!” He says, and hangs up.</p><p>… </p><p>I knock once on Patton’s door.</p><p>His parent opens it. “Oh! Hi Logan!” They say. “Is there anything you need?”</p><p>“Salutations Jordan. I got an urgent call for Patton.”</p><p>Jordan shrugs, “Come on in then.”</p><p>“Thank you.” I step into the house and walk up the stairs to Patton’s room. I press my ear to the door, I don’t hear anything. Surprisingly I hear sniffles from Virgil’s room.</p><p>Oh no.</p><p>I’m not the best with feelings. Patton had a mental breakdown in 8th grade, when he was self-harming.</p><p>I tried my best to console him, but I didn’t succeed. Luckily I convinced him to ask a professional to help from then on. I feel bad for not being able to deal with it, but that’s in the past now. I cannot dwell on troubling thoughts.</p><p>I brace myself and open the door, “Patton, Virgil, are you alright?” I ask.</p><p>“Logan!” Patton says, springing up and rushing over to hug me. He seems very emotional at the moment.</p><p>“Someone’s excited to see you.” I look over Patton’s shoulder to see Virgil sitting on his bed with what appears to be a plate of pizza rolls, mozzarella sticks, and cookies. Highly unhealthy.</p><p>I remember his assumption that Patton and I are dating, I assume that that is what his comment was about. So I glare at him, he just rolls his eyes.</p><p>When Patton lets go of me I ask, “What did you need me for?”</p><p>Patton turns to Virgil, “Will you tell Logan the story?”</p><p>Virgil launches into a story of my two brothers. I knew that Remus convinced Roman to go to a laser tag game with Virgil, but I did not know he blackmailed him into doing so. I also have no idea what the ‘bargain is’.</p><p>It’s absolutely horrifying me to know that one of my brothers is blackmailing his twin, but I don’t let it show on my face.</p><p>Although, I may have an inkling about what Remus is blackmailing Roman about.</p><p>“Logan.” Patton says, “Do you know anything about this?”</p><p>I nod, “I think I might know what the secret is.”</p><p>“You do?” Virgil asks, he sounds surprised.</p><p>“Yes. I am hesitant to reveal it though. It happens to be a sore subject with certain people.”</p><p>“Oh.”</p><p>“But if it helps to get Roman out of this mess, I will do so.”</p><p>Both Patton and Virgil seem to hold their breath.</p><p>Do I want to do this? It would be violating Roman’s privacy. I could be wrong, but I am fairly certain that what I’m about to say is correct.</p><p>“I think Roman is gay.”</p><p>I hear Patton gasp, and Virgil says, “What!?”</p><p>“I have noticed certain behaviors in him that have pointed to this conclusion. He always gets uncomfortable when he is asked if he has a girlfriend. He also left a notebook on the kitchen counter, I didn’t mean to pry, but I saw a sentence that said, ‘Thank god I don’t like girls.’”</p><p>I pause before revealing the last bit of information.</p><p>“I have seen how he interacts with you, Virgil. He seems to have a ‘crush’ on you.”</p><p>Virgil looks shocked. But he stays silent, as if taking in what I had just said.</p><p>“Do with that information as you will.” I say.</p><p>“Okay,” Patton says, “So we probably know what his secret is. We can’t exactly shout it to the world. So, what do we do?”</p><p>I adjust my glasses, “Well, I can only think of one way: Find out what this ‘bargain’ is, and expose Remus’ end of the deal. Since he is still blackmailing Roman into keeping his end of the ‘bargain’, we should convince Roman to come out, assuming that that is the secret.”</p><p>I look pointedly at Virgil. He shakes his head, “We aren’t friends anymore. I can’t do that, you and Patton are probably closer to him right now than I am.”</p><p>“Virgil, ever since you two had that fight he’s been more depressed than ever. A couple of days ago he was sent home for swearing at a teacher. He would never do that under normal circumstances. Losing you as a friend and this ‘bargain’ is obviously putting strain on him.”</p><p>I watch as Virgil bite his lip and turns away from me. Patton looks back and forth between us then goes over to Virgil.</p><p>“Will you say that you’ll at least try to make up with him kiddo?”</p><p>The silence seems to stretch on for years, even though logically it was only a few seconds.</p><p>“I’ll try.”</p><p>I see Patton smile, and something seems to flutter in my chest because of it. Odd.</p><p>Virgil turns back to me, “Also, you should know that Roman is self harming.”</p><p>I blink.</p><p>No.</p><p>Roman can’t.</p><p>Not after Patton. </p><p>I need to help him.</p><p>I need to help Roman, I can't let him do this.</p><p>“Will you guys give me some space?” Virgil asks quietly, snapping me out of my thoughts.</p><p>“Of course, kiddo.”</p><p>Patton and I exit Virgil’s room. As the door closes I see a tear fall down Patton’s cheek.</p><p>“Patton?” I ask, “Are you alright.”</p><p>“What?” He looks up at me and wipes the tear off his face, “Yeah, I’m fine.”</p><p>“No, you’re not. Do you remember what happened the last time you ‘bottled your feelings.’ It’s never good. You can’t do that.”</p><p>Patton’s expression turns angry, “Yeah, and you can!?”</p><p>“What?” I’m surprised, Patton is almost never cross.</p><p>“Don’t try that with me Lo! You act like you’re a robot all the time! Like you have no emotion! You always have a blank expression on your face, as if you don’t care. Even now, when you found out that one of your brothers is blackmailing your other one, and that Roman is self harming! You just kept a stone cold expression on your face, like you were made out of metal!”</p><p>I can see the tears falling freely now. I feel an immense pain in my chest seeing Patton this sad and angry. It’s like a hundred elephants are trampling on top of me. It’s a frightening feeling, and I fight hard to keep it off my face.</p><p>“You’re not a robot Lo! You’re a human and human’s have emotions! You bottle them up all the time! And it’s not healthy, you can’t just ignore them! They’re there and they’re real! Please, you help people all the time, but you never help yourself! You help me, even if you don’t know it! Now let me help you.”</p><p>“Patton…” I say weakly, trying to keep the pain out of my voice.</p><p>“No! I don’t want your excuses! You need to let-”</p><p>Feeling bold, and not knowing what else to do, I pull Patton into my arms. The feeling is so new to me. I’m used to him always hugging /me/, but now I’m the one with my arms around his shoulders.</p><p>I hear him gasp. But then he buries his head in my neck, and wraps his arms around my waist. I can feel him shaking, and I know that he’s still crying.</p><p>The pain in my chest increases until I almost can’t breathe. My nose starts to burn, and then I feel something wet slide down my face.</p><p>A tear.</p><p>I’m crying.</p><p>That's… almost a miracle.</p><p>I don’t actually remember the last time I cried. I think it was when a child bullied me in the fifth grade. I told my teacher, but he told me to man up, and that boys didn’t cry. So I didn’t for several years. Until I learned what toxic masculinity is. But by then it was too late, I didn’t even know how to cry.</p><p>I watched videos on how to fake cry, I listened to sad songs, I watched psychologist after phycologist explain that crying is a natural thing that all humans do, and how good it is for your mental health. I even watched videos of soldiers coming home, pets being put down, and people dying.</p><p>Except it never worked. I would never shed a single tear. Even when I was physically hurt. For the longest time, I thought there was something wrong with me because I /just couldn’t cry/.</p><p>But here I am.</p><p>Crying.</p><p>I can’t stop the tears as they roll down my cheeks. And surprisingly, I don’t want to.</p><p>When Patton pulls away, he notices the tears on my face. “Logan, you’re crying.”</p><p>I nod, unable to speak.</p><p>“I don’t think I’ve ever seen you cry.”</p><p>I shake my head. Patton hugs me again, and we just stand like that in the hallway. Holding each other tight.</p><p>When the tears finally subside, I feel empty.</p><p>“Are you okay?” Patton whispers.</p><p>“No.” My voice sounds hoarse. But at least I told the truth.</p><p>“Oh Logan…” Patton reaches up and wipes the tears off my face, “Come one.” He gently takes my arm and leads me down the stairs and into the living room. We sit on the couch, it’s light blue, much like everything else in Patton’s house. </p><p>“Will you tell me what’s wrong?”</p><p>“I haven’t cried since I was a little kid.” I mumble, hanging my head. “I thought that it was okay not to cry. That not showing emotion was a sign of strength. I didn’t realize how wrong I was until it was too late. By then I was used to not showing anything on my face at all.”</p><p>Patton takes my hand in his and rubs slow circles on the back of it. It comforts me.</p><p>“I hide all of my feelings because they scare me. They don’t make sense. So I push them away. I didn’t realize how much I was hurting other people too. I’m really, really sorry Patton.”</p><p>“You don’t have to be sorry.” He responds, “It’s not your feelings’ job to make sense. You just experience them. It’s okay to have feelings, Logan.”</p><p>“I know. It’s just difficult to express myself now.”</p><p>“Your right, it is. It’s hard for me too, sometimes. But that shouldn’t stop us from feeling and caring. You should be glad that you have feelings, sure you can feel sad sometimes, but don’t forget that you can feel happy at other times!”</p><p>I smile a little, Patton has a way of making me aware to the figurative ‘bright side’ of every situation.</p><p>Patton lies his head on my shoulder, it’s a strange show of affection but not entirely unpleasant. He fiddles with my hand, “Can I ask you something?”</p><p>“You just did, but sure.”</p><p>Patton smirks, “Dad joke.”</p><p>I roll my eyes, but I can tell there’s a hint of a smile on my face.</p><p>Patton hesitates, but asks, “Do you self harm?”</p><p>I take a deep breath, “I do not. But I have come close. I felt the need to punish myself for having feelings. Then I thought logically and told myself that self harm is never the answer.”</p><p>Patton nods, satisfied with my answer. He pulls me into another hug. “I’m just glad you’re okay.” He says into my shirt, “I care about you Lo. It hurts to see you like this.”</p><p>I feel the thing flutter in my chest again.</p><p>“Thank you Patton.” I say as he pulls away, “I did not know that I needed this. So thank you.”</p><p>He gives me a soft smile. “Your welcome Lo.”</p><p>I smile back. “I also wanted to make sure you were okay.”</p><p>Patton nods, “I am now. I was upset earlier because you refused to show any emotion. I just wanted to help you, but it was impossible.”</p><p>“I’m sorry Patton.” I don’t argue with the fact that he said it was impossible. Because it probably was, for a while at least.</p><p>“It’s okay, now I know why, and I forgive you.”</p><p>Patton’s face suddenly changes from solemn to mischievous. “Hey Logan. How do you get a squirrel to like you?”</p><p>I sigh, but go along with his joke. Presumably of the dad verity. “How?”</p><p>“You act like a nut.”</p><p>I crack a small smile and Patton starts laughing rather loudly. I thought it would annoy me like usual, but this time it didn’t.</p><p>Patton suggests that we play a board game. I agree, so we get out Chutes and Ladders. It’s a little childish, but Patton likes it. And anything that makes Patton happy at the moment, I’ll go along with.</p><p>We end up playing for several rounds, and the whole time, that fluttering feeling in my chest stays there. It never leaves.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Thank you for reading! Any comments will be appreciated including constructive criticism.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0011"><h2>11. Rehearsal</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Okayyyy, next chapter here we go. This one is defiantly angsty, with me, what one isn't?</p><p>TW: major panic attack, and I think that's all.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Roman’s POV</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Hey Roman? Earth to Roman!”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I snap my head up, Thomas is poking me with a pencil.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Dude, you feel asleep.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Sorry.” I mutter and look back up at the teacher.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I haven’t been getting any sleep lately. With rehearsals running late sometimes, my anxiety about Remus, and the stress of school, it’s almost impossible to. And though I hate to admit it, Virgil's absence in my life has definitely taken its toll on me. It’s all been keeping me up. Let alone all the night’s I’ll stay up, destroying my arms and legs with scissors.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The only thing I really have to look forward to these days is the play. Although my performance is hindered due to my lack of sleep.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The last bell of the day rings. I pack up my stuff and walk out of the classroom door. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Time for rehearsal.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>… </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Alright Roman, from the top, can you give me a more aloof attitude, remember you are a /</span>
  <em>
    <span>prince</span>
  </em>
  <span>/!”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I nod and start the scene again, “I don’t really see the problem, Princess. We can stay here until daybreak.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The actor (Selene) playing Tiana looks at me in anger, “There are crocodiles out there! We need to think up a plan and get out. And for the last time I’m not a princess!”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I roll my eyes and fake a huge yawn, “Well, being as tired as I am, beauty sleep is a must.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“But-”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Goodnight princess!”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I lay down on the bed of leaves laid out on the stage, and pretend to sleep.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Okay, that was better.” Dr. Picani says, “I felt the aloof attitude. Remember the little things count everybody. But take five for now, we’ll go over Ray’s scenes soon.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>There’s a chorus of ‘Thank you five’, and I go to sit backstage, usually there isn’t supposed to be any food or drink backstage but Picani let us. Only if we had a long rehearsal, and we kept everything in the far corner.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I sit down and grab my water, taking a much needed sip. Sure it was room temperature so it wasn’t refreshing, but at least it was good for my vocal chords.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Hello Roman.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I know that voice.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I turn and glare at Janus, “What do you want?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He smirks at me, “Why would you assume I want something.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You usually want trouble.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“No. Not usually, just sometimes. All I want to know right now is how Virgil is doing.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“He’s fine.” I say through gritted teeth.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“And you would know that, wouldn't you, because you two seem to be /</span>
  <em>
    <span>best friends</span>
  </em>
  <span>/. Right?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I stare up at Janus, shocked that he would stoop that low. “Just leave me alone Janus. Besides, I don’t know what you're talking about, Virgil and I are still close.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“We both know that’s bullshit.” He starts to walk away, then turns back, “Remember, it takes a lier, to know a lier. Trust me Roman, half the things you say these days are lies.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Janus is called to the stage to go over a scene, and I’m left staring after him.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I wonder how much he actually knows.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>… </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>After rehearsal I put in my ear buds and start the long walk home.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>It’s my musical playlist again. That’s the only thing that makes me feel any emotion besides crushing sadness these days.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I hum along to the words. But I have to skip Waving Through a Window, it used to be my favorite song until… well you know.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I wonder what Virgil’s doing right now. He’s probably still mad at me. Oh well, there's nothing I can do.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>But is there? Could I apologize?</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I sit down on a bench on the path to think.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>What would I have to apologize for?</b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Hurting him!</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>Did you hurt him? Or did you hurt yourself?</b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I hurt myself but-</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>Then it’s fine.</b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>But he just looked so angry.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>But that’s not your fault.</b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I feel like it is, if I hadn’t shunned him and ignored him we could have avoided this.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I suddenly feel light headed. Oh shit. I didn’t realize how hard I was breathing until now.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Okay, okay. I need to breathe. If I don’t breathe I might pass out.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Shit. Now I'm breathing faster.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Calm down!</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Breathe, breathe, breath.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I can’t.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I can’t breathe.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>You need to breathe.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Please breath.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I can’t pass out here. In the open.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>No. I can’t breathe.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I can’t breathe.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I can’t breathe.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I can’t breathe.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I can’t.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Help me.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Roman, Roman can you hear me?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I can’t breathe.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I need to breathe.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Please help me.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Roman, listen to my voice.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Okay. I can’t breathe. Please help me!</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Can I touch you?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Yes. Help me.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Can name five things you can see?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Maybe… tree, grass… I can’t… yes I can… bench, hand… leg.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Good, now name four things you can feel.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>A hand, bench… foot… hair.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Okay, keep going, three things you can hear.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I can hear… only my own breathing, and your voice.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“That’s okay, just tell me two things you can smell.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The grass, and my gum.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Right, one more thing you can taste.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>My gum.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The world starts to focus again.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>First the trees, then the grass and the path, the bench and finally, the person sitting next to me.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Virgil.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Oh shit, Virgil. He had to see me like that!</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>No, no, no, no, no, no, no!</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Roman, are you alright?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I nod and look down at my feet.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“That was a panic attack wasn’t it?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I nod again.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I feel Virgil take my hand. “Will you look at me?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I slowly raise my head, bracing myself to see anger on his face. But… there is none. He’s…  sad? And there’s sympathy in his eyes.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“How did this happen?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I shrug my shoulders trying to come off as nonchalant, “I don’t really know. It was probably just something that startled me.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Virgil shakes his head, “We both know that’s a lie.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>His words trigger something in the back of my mind. ‘We both know that’s bullshit. Remember, it takes a lier, to know a lier. Trust me Roman, half the things you say these days are lies.’</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Maybe Janus has a point.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“What?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Oh.” My head snaps up again, “Did I say that out loud?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Virgil looks at me skeptically, “Yeah… you also were saying ‘help me’ and ‘I can’t breathe’ out loud.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I inhale sharply, “Really?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Yeah. Just know that whatever some out of Janus’ mouth are lies. Are you sure you’re okay?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I give him a ‘don’t worry about me’ look, “Of course I am!”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He narrows his eyes, “Bullshit.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“And why would you say that.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Because there’s a tear rolling down your cheek right now.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Oh.” I reach up and wipe it off.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Roman, please tell me what happened.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I shake my head, “I swear, I’m perfectly fine! That was probably just an after effect of the panic attack or something.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I stand up and start to walk down the path again, toward home.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Bottling it doesn’t /</span>
  <em>
    <span>help</span>
  </em>
  <span>/!” Virgil yells after me, he sounds frustrated.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I’m not bottling anything!” I say over my shoulder.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“But you are! I know you are!”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“No I’m not!” I snarl.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Roman, you need to talk about your feelings. If you hide them, you’ll never fix anything.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I round on him, snapping, “Isn’t that a /</span>
  <em>
    <span>little</span>
  </em>
  <span>/ hypocritical coming from you?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He stands up, and I can tell I’ve hit a nerve. “What?” He spits.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Don’t play dumb Virgil. I’m not stupid, you’ve never told me the full story with Janus, you never tell me any of your feelings, and you never let them show. So how do /</span>
  <em>
    <span>you</span>
  </em>
  <span>/ expect /</span>
  <em>
    <span>me</span>
  </em>
  <span>/ to open up when I can’t trust you!”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Virgil stares at me, “I didn’t realize…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Yeah, well good for you.” I say bitterly and turn back around.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>But he stops me, “Roman wait. I- I want to apologize for the things I said in the hospital. It was wrong of me, and there’s nothing I can do to excuse it. But maybe I can explain it. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"</span>
  <span>I was so angry. Not at you. But at whoever made you feel the need to cut yourself. I was scared too. Scared that you might end it all. And I couldn’t lose you- I /</span>
  <em>
    <span>can’t</span>
  </em>
  <span>/ lose you.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He pauses and seems to come to a decision.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“And that’s why you deserve to hear my whole history with Janus.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>We sit back down on the bench, and I listen, fascinated, as recaps everything that happened with that snake. I can tell it’s hard for him to dive too deep into the past, but he does it anyway.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“And that’s why I vowed to forget him.” Virgil says, finishing the story, “But then he showed up here all the way from Minnesota.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I don’t say anything for a while, I’m trying to find the right words. And I’m also trying to think of what to do.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I think I can do it... it’s been like this for too long. I need someone to know, Virgil is definitely someone I can trust. He seems like the right person to tell.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Thank you for sharing that Virgil. I can tell it took a great deal of courage. And that’s why it’s my turn to be brave and tell you… everything.”</span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Thanks for reading, sorry if this one was a little short.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0012"><h2>12. A Jumble</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Okay, I honestly don't know what the hell happened in this chapter. So good luck, cause I went completely off script. This chapter was not planned whatsoever.... yeah. Whoops.</p><p>Anyway TW: mentions of suicide</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Virgil</span>
  <span>’s POV</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“And that’s why it’s my turn to be brave and tell you… everything.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I look up Roman in shock. “No Ro-”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“It’s fine Virgil.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“But your being blackmailed-”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Roman puts a hand on my shoulder, “Virgil, it’ll be fine, I need to deal with this right now, or else I never will.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Are you sure?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Yes.” He squeezes his eyes shut, “The first thing you need to know is that I’m gay.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Yeah, Logan kind of figured that out.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Roman opens his eyes in shock, “What? How? You know what, never mind.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Remus also figured that out somehow. And he used that to blackmail me into going to the laser tag thing. You know what happened there. He had to disable the security cameras to rig the slime. That’s why nobody came to get us out, cause the cameras were shut off.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>But that’s not all, when the workers heard the siren he used that as a decoy for his real scheme. Drugs.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“No!”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Yes.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“How do you know all this?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Roman hangs his head, “He told me. But I couldn’t tell the authorities, because one: I didn’t have any evidence, two: he can easily frame me, and three: I can’t come out yet.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I’m honestly speechless.” I say.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Roman chuckles bitterly, “Yeah, well, I am too.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Can you tell me about the ‘bargain’?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“That /</span>
  <em>
    <span>is</span>
  </em>
  <span>/ the bargain, I don’t tell anyone that he dealing illegal drugs, he doesn’t reveal that I'm gay.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“That’s not a bargain! That’s blackmail!”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I know. My own brother, my own twin, is willing to blackmail me so he can get high.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I pull out my phone, “Can I tell some people who might be able to help?” I ask, wanting Roman to trust me.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Who?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Patton and Logan.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Alright.” He says, “I think I can trust them, but we can’t let Remus find out.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Okay.” I dial Logan’s number, but before I can press the call button, Roman pulls me into a sudden hug.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I’m surprised, I don’t think we’ve ever hugged before. It’s odd, but not entirely horrible. I could honestly get used to it.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Thank you Virgil.” He says.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Anytime Princey.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Patton</span>
  <span>’s P.O.V</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I’m walking out of the ice cream shop I work at when I hear two voices coming from behind the building. Normally I would have ignored them, but one of the people sounds like Roman’s twin. Logan said to gather as much evidence as possible to see what the bargain is, so I should go and investigate. Wow! It’s like I’m a real detective.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I sneak around the corner and duck behind the garbage bins, I can practically hear the dramatic music!</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Sure enough, when I sneak a peek I see Remus standing next to a short guy in a yellow t-shirt. Who’s that?</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I take out my phone and start recording.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“-us! You can’t keep doing this, you have to-” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I don’t have to do anything.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“But this isn’t the answer!”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“How do you know?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Because revenge feels as good as you think it will! Trust me, I know.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“It’s different for everyone. Besides you don’t know what I went through.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I know that you were stupid to chase someone across the country!”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I don’t care what you think Remus! You agreed to this.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I never agreed, I was blackmailed!”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“So? You still have to help me.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You blackmailed me into blackmailing my brother. I caught him trying to commit suicide! Do you know how traumatizing it is to find someone you love about to jump out of a fucking window!?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You always say that you hate your brother.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Yeah, well maybe I don’t. We all lie sometimes, Janus you of all people should know that. And you made me do this just to get back at a person who dumped you months ago! How petty can you be?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Very.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I watch as the yellow guy, er, Janus walks away and leaves Remus standing there. I’m shaking from what I just witnessed, I need to get this back to Logan.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Roman’s POV</span>
</p><p>
  <span>… 30 minutes later, in Patton’s room… </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“So let me get this straight.” Logan says.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Patton snickers, “Good luck with that.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Logan glares at him, but the effect is ruined by the tiny smile on his lips.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Remus blackmailed Roman into going to the laser tag game by threatening to tell everyone that he is gay, and using the diversion of slime, he stole something from the arcade and illegal drugs. Then he then told Roman all of this knowing that he wouldn’t tell anyone because of the 'bargain’ which is essentially blackmail.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I nod, “All checks out.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Logan and Virgil exchange glances, “This is a lot more serious than we originally thought. Virgil has also informed me that you self harm.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I cast a sharp look at the emo, “He did, did he?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Don’t get mad at him Roman,” Patton says, placing a hand on my shoulder, “He was only looking out for you.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Logan adjusts his glasses, “I hope you know that self harm is not a good way to cope with feelings.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Patton shakes his head, “It’s not. Trust me I know.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Virgil takes my hand hesitantly, “Roman, just know that we’re here if you need to talk.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Thanks guys.” The words sound hollow even to me.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I also have another thing to tell you all.” Patton says, taking out his phone, “I ran into Remus and a guy in a yellow shirt after my shift today…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>My brother?</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Patton sets up the phone on the end of his bed, and presses play on a video.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>“You can’t keep doing this, your have to-”</b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I don’t have to do anything.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Yeah, it’s my brother. Talking to… Janus? I glance to my left where Virgil’s sitting. He’s gone ridged. I squeeze his hand in a comforting gesture.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>“But this isn’t the answer!”</b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“How do you know?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Hearing both of their voices is making my blood boil.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <b>Because revenge feels as good as you think it will! Trust me, I know.”</b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“It’s different for everyone. Besides you don’t know what I went through.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Pfft! What /</span>
  <em>
    <span>Janus</span>
  </em>
  <span>/ went through! How about what he put Virgil through!</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>“I know that you were stupid to chase someone across the country!”</b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I don’t care what you think Remus! You agreed to this.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>“I never agreed, I was blackmailed!”</b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>What? /</span>
  <em>
    <span>Remus</span>
  </em>
  <span>/ was blackmailed? For what?</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“So? You still have to help me.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>How dare Janus blackmail my twin!</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>“You blackmailed me into blackmailing my brother. I caught him trying to commit suicide! Do you know how traumatizing it is to find someone you love about to jump out of a fucking window!?”</b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Everyone whips their head around to look at me. But my eyes are fixed on Patton’s phone screen…</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Remus loves me?</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Someone loves me?</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You always say that you hate your brother.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>“Yeah, well maybe I don’t. We all lie sometimes, Janus you of all people should know that. And you made me do this just to get back at a person who dumped you months ago! How petty can you be?”</b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Very.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I watch as Janus walks away, then the video stops.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Everyone is looking at me, but I don’t care. I can feel the tears sliding down my face. Virgil squeezes my hand. Patton pulls me into a hug and Logan puts a comforting hand on my shoulder.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Kiddo, we love you.” Patton says, “Please don’t end it all.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I’m crying too much to reply.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Roman, I don’t know what I would have done if I had lost you.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I look up, Logan is looking at me. Are those tears? Is he crying? I’ve never seen him cry.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Logan, I-”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>And then he hugs me.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He actually hugs me.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I cry into his shoulder. My brother has never shown this much feeling in all of the time I’ve lived with him. I doubted that he even had emotions.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Logan pulls back, and I can see Patton smiling at him.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Umm,” a voice speaks up from beside me, I turn to Virgil.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Can you two leave us alone for a sec?” He asks.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Both Logan and Patton nod and exchange a knowing look. They leave Patton’s room and close the door behind them.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“What did you need?” I ask.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He looks down at his hand, (which is still holding mine) and mumbles something.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“What?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He bites his lip and refuses to look me in the eye. “I just wanted to say after that video… we still love you.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>My shoulders drop. “I know that in theory, Virge. But it’s so hard to believe it.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The silence stretches out forever.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“And I know this probably isn’t the best time, but I-I also wanted you to know that… I like you. In a ‘more than a friend’ way.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I freeze. No way! I never thought that this would happen. Sure, I’ve daydreamed about it thousands of times. But it actually happened… </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Virgil looks up at me. He seems to read the expression on my face as a bad one, and panics.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Oh, um, sorry, forget I said anything. I-I’ll leave-”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Before he can go, I reach over, grab his hoodie and kiss him full on. A ball of warmth explodes in my chest, and I hear Virgil gasp. His lips are soft and smooth, like silk. I close my eyes, wanting to stay like this forever.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Then he reaches up and wraps his arms around my shoulders. I wrap my arms around his waist and bring him closer.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Dear god! I’ve wanted this for so long.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I love him.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I love Virgil.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>It hasn’t been that long. Only a couple of months. But I can say for sure that I love him. When we first met I thought that we would never click. He is very emo, and I’m a musical loving, Disney fan. Who knew that we’d fall for eachother?</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He was so supportive of me all the time. During my audition, and when I told him about my brother, and when he found out I was gay.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>And now he’s here, keeping me grounded. Keeping me from ending it all.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>When we pull away Virgil smiles. It’s the brightest smile I’ve seen in a while.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I take a deep breath, “I know what happened with Janus, and I know how he hurt you.” I pause. “And I promise that I will never leave you. I promise I will never hurt you in all the time I live. And as a prince I will always keep my promises.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Virgil looks at me for a long time.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>And then I see something change on his face.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He trusts me.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>After everything Janus did to him, after his parents shipped him around the country, after everyone betrayed him. Virgil can still trust someone. And that someone is me.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I pull him into a hug. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Thank you.” I whisper.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>…Virgil’s POV… </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Thank you.” Roman whispers.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I don’t reply. I can’t. I finally found someone to trust after Janus.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I hope I’m not making a huge mistake.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>I feel happier than I’ve been in a while. But something’s still nagging at the back of my mind. Something Remus said in the video:</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <b>‘And you made me do this just to get back at a person who dumped you months ago!’</b>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Janus is looking for revenge.</span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Hehe. Yeah. I don't know either.</p><p>Also, shoutout to MelodiRead, thanks for helping motivate me to keep going! Check them out, they have a cool oneshot 'Bound By The Stars' it's pretty ding darn diddly cute.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0013"><h2>13. The Woods</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Hey guys! Another chapter is going up! Yay. This one took me waaaayyy too long to write. I'm too single to write this shit.</p><p>Anyway TW: none, maybe angst, but that's it.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Roman’s POV<br/>The next day</p><p>Sunshine: hey roman!</p><p>Princey: Hello my Chemically Imbalanced Romance!</p><p>Sunshine: i thought i told u not to call me that</p><p>Princey: Too bad!</p><p>Sunshine: ughh! youre so annoying! </p><p>Princey: But you love me!</p><p>Sunshine: do I?</p><p>Princey: :(</p><p>Sunshine: …</p><p>Sunshine: fine.</p><p>Sunshine: i kinda do.</p><p>Princey: :) I'm better now!</p><p>Sunshine: whatever</p><p>Princey: You’re cute when you’re mad.</p><p>Sunshine: excuse me! i am never cute!</p><p>Princey: Yeah you are. And you know, there’s such a thing as capital letters right?</p><p>Sunshine: yeah, esthetic.</p><p>Princey: Jesus.</p><p>Sunshine: haha, actually, i wanted to talk to you</p><p>Princey: Okay? Over text or.. .</p><p>Sunshine: no, it would be easier in person i think</p><p>Princey: Okay, fine with me then, do you want to meet at ____________ park?</p><p>Sunshine: sure, see u there</p><p>Prince: Bye J.Delightful.</p><p>I set my phone down on my bedside, and get ready to meet my boyfriend at the park.</p><p>Wow. That sounds weird. Boyfriend.</p><p>Virgil Lilith is my boyfriend.</p><p>Holy shit.</p><p>How is this just hitting me now?</p><p>… </p><p>“Hey Virge!” I say, walking up behind the emo.</p><p>“Hey Princey.”</p><p>“What did you want to talk about?”</p><p>He doesn’t look at me, but says, “Can we go somewhere private? Like the woods over there?”</p><p>He points over to the wood opposite us. I shrug, “Sure.”</p><p>As we walk over, I snatch quick glances at Virgil. He seems nervous as he is chewing on his hoodie sleeve. We find a small clearing and sit down on the leaf strewn ground.</p><p>Virgil takes a deep breath, “Roman, you need to talk to your brother.”</p><p>“Logan?” I ask confused, “I talk to him all the time.”</p><p>Virgil shakes his head, “No. you need to talk to Remus.”</p><p>I stare at him, “What? Why would I do that?”</p><p>“You need to find out the full story. None of the rest of us can do it Roman.”</p><p>“I’m not going to talk to that piece of shit.” I say angrily, “And I don’t need to find out the whole story! I’m fine just like this.”</p><p>“But you're not!”</p><p>“Yes I am!”</p><p>Virgil sighs, “Look Roman, the only way you’re going to get out of this is to make up with him. You saw the video, Janus is blackmailing Remus, too. If you talked to him I’m sure he would tell you, or call off the threat!”</p><p>“You don’t know my brother very well then.” I say darkly, glaring down at my feet.</p><p>“Just please say that you’ll think about it.”</p><p>I look up into Virgil’s dark brown eyes, I’m surprised to see that he’s afraid for me. I drop my shoulders, “Fine I’ll think about it.”</p><p>“Tha-”</p><p>“But on one condition.”</p><p>“What is it?”</p><p>I smirk, “You go on a romantic walk through the woods with me.”</p><p>Virgil rolls his eyes, “Fine.” He sounds annoyed, but I can tell there’s a hint of a smile on his face.</p><p>“C’mon!” I grab his hand and run down one of the trails.</p><p>“Princey!!!”</p><p>I laugh, “I know a cool place!”</p><p>We run down the leafy trail giggling, like in those cheesy rom-coms. I have the perfect spot. I lead him down to a small pond in the middle of the woods. It’s closed in by trees on all sides, and from this angle it looks a bit ugly, but I assure you, it’s amazing once you have a good look at it.</p><p>“A pond?” Virgil questions.</p><p>“Yeah! C'mon, I have a surprise, but you have to close your eyes.”</p><p>“Ughh.” Virgil groans, “I hate surprises.” But he closes his eyes anyway and clings to my arm. It’s a show of trust that I don’t take for granted.</p><p>I take him down a sort of rocky trial around the edge of the pond.</p><p>“Okay to your left, there’s a big step.”</p><p>“I got that thanks.”</p><p>“Okay a big rock here. Just sidestep…”</p><p>“Right…”</p><p>“Down here.”</p><p>“Kay.”</p><p>“And a stump.”</p><p>“Right. Thanks.”</p><p>“Alright, around here.”</p><p>“Okay. Are we there y-”</p><p>“Virgil! Tree!”</p><p>“Ouch! God! You seriously couldn’t have chosen an easier trail?”</p><p>“Oh ha ha. Okay we’re almost there, just this last big jump.”</p><p>“Jump!?”</p><p>“As soon as you hear my feet hit the ground, jump down.”</p><p>“Wait what?”</p><p>I land on my feet. “Just come on!” I roll my eyes and tug on his arm.</p><p>“Sto- aaaahh.”</p><p>He stumbles over the edge of the rock, and falls down… right to where I'm ready to catch him.</p><p>His eyes fly open and I can see pink spreading on his cheeks. I lean down and place a soft kiss on his slightly parted lips.</p><p>“See? I caught you.”</p><p>“Whatever.” He grumbles, but his ears are fully red.</p><p>“Okay.” I say, “This is it, we’re here.”</p><p>I step aside to reveal a cluster of Weeping Willow trees, they’re in a circle with a small grassy clearing in the center. The pond is right beside the grove, full of lily pads and cattails. The sun is in just the right spot, shining down through the branches and lighting up the leaves so much that they look like they’re glowing.</p><p>“Wow.” Virgil breathes, “I literally cannot think of anything bitter to remark…”</p><p>I watch his eyes light up as he pushes his way through the outer branches. “Roman, how did you find this place?”</p><p>I shrug and walk in after him, “I guess I just stumbled on it one day. I think I was six. I don’t really know, but as far as I know, nobody else comes here. It’s been my safe haven since I was little, I never told anyone about it. Not even the readers.”</p><p>Virgil looks at me, confused, “The what?”</p><p>“The readers- you know what. Never mind.”</p><p>“Okay…”</p><p>Suddenly Virgil leaps into the air, I look up and spot him hanging upside on a branch. I shake my head, “You’re climbing trees /here/?”</p><p>“Yeah.” Virgil sticks his nose up, “You got a problem with that?”</p><p>“No, I just don’t want to try that fiasco again.”</p><p>“Aww, is Princey too scared?”</p><p>“No I just-”</p><p>“Well if you're not, come up here.” He challenges.</p><p>Well, being the honorable person I am, I can’t back down from that.</p><p>“Fine, but on one condition.”</p><p>“Oh god, another one?”</p><p>“Yep.”</p><p>“What is it?”</p><p>“You agree to let me teach you how to waltz.”</p><p>“What, no!”</p><p>“Then I’m not going up there.”</p><p>“Ughh, fine whatever. I’ll do it.”</p><p>“Yay!” I clap my hands together, and stare up at the tree, “So how do I do this?”</p><p>Virgil chuckles and jumps down beside me, “Here, put your foot on this knot.”</p><p>He leads me up the tree, he’s graceful when he moves from branch to branch, but I can only assume that I look like a flopping fish out of water.</p><p>I’m just getting the hang of it, when my foot slips off a leafy branch. “Virgil!” I scream, and cling to the tree trunk.</p><p>Virgil looks down at me panicking and laughs.</p><p>“This is no laughing matter! What do I do!?”</p><p>“Princey, just put your foot back out.”</p><p>Crossing my fingers, I thrust my leg out and find that my shoes hit a branch. Once I have a good grip, I sigh. Above me, Virgil is cackling. My face starts to heat up, “This is no laughing matter!”</p><p>“It is though.”</p><p>“Shut up.”</p><p>When we’re finally back on the ground Virgil walks over to the edge of the pond and sits down. I join him, taking my shoes off and dipping my feet in. I hear Virgil sigh and I look over, sensing that something might be wrong.</p><p>“Virge, are you okay?”</p><p>Virgil’s POV</p><p>“Virge, are you okay?”</p><p>Oh god, this is what I was afraid of; how am I supposed to answer this question? I don’t even know if I’m okay.</p><p>The lie slips out before I can stop it, “Yeah, I’m good.”</p><p>“Buuuulllshiiiit.” Roman sings, “I can tell when something's wrong. So what is?”</p><p>Again, my reflexes kick in. “Nothing.”</p><p>Roman shakes his head, “Virgil, please tell me. I want to help.”</p><p>I swallow back  another flippant reply, and I have to remind myself that trust needs to go both ways.</p><p>“I guess there might be something.”</p><p>I feel Roman’s gaze burning holes in my hoodie as I fidget with my fingers.</p><p>“It’s just, why-why would you want to date me?”</p><p>“What do you mean.” Roman sounds genuinely confused by my words.</p><p>I shrug, “I don’t know, it's just why would you bother spending any time with me? You’re… amazing, creative, passionate, caring. And I’m… whatever the hell I am. It just doesn't seem right for you to care about me, when I pale so much in comparison.”</p><p>Roman places a hand on my knee, “Virgil, I’m going to say something that you said a long time ago. ‘I know what it feels like to think that no one cares, that you're on your own. But you need to know that you're not. I’m here. I’m right here.’”</p><p>I glance up and find him looking at me with big chocolate brown eyes, “I know why you’re feeling like this, and know that your wrong.”</p><p>“What?”</p><p>“Don’t play dumb, you know exactly what I’m talking about. Ever since what Janus said, ever since you left Minnesota, you’ve felt unworthy of love. You doubted that anyone could ever love someone like you. You felt like everyone you ever loved would leave. Trust me, I’ve been there, I am still there. But we’ll work through it together. I want to be with you, I want you to be with me.</p><p>“Virgil, I’m not going anywhere.”</p><p>As much as I want to, I can’t look away from Roman’s eyes. They’re locked with mine, making sure that I don’t let go. Roman places a gentle hand on my cheek, “I’m not letting go…” he whispers.</p><p>He tilts my chin up slightly, and leans closer. “Can I kiss you?” He asks quietly, breath ghosting my lips. I nod slightly, and he leans down the rest of the way.</p><p>As Roman moves his lips against mine, I wrap my arms around his neck and twine my fingers in his hair. I run my fingers through it, trying to memorize every part of Roman’s mouth.</p><p>I let out a tiny gasp as he nips my bottom lip. Roman chuckles a little, taking his hands off of my face and winding them around my waist. I blush as he pulls me closer.</p><p>When we finally break the kiss, I see Roman staring at me in awe. I blush deeper, “What?”</p><p>“You’re beautiful.” He breaths.</p><p>I smack him lightly on the arm, “Shut up.”</p><p>Roman rolls his eyes, but then his expression turns serious, “Are you okay, really okay?”</p><p>I think for a moment, “Yes, I think I am.”</p><p>Roman stands back up, “Alright, I seem to remember /someone/ promising me a dance.”</p><p>He holds out a hand, I take it. He pulls me up with surprising strength. I stumble and fall into his arms.</p><p>“Uh oh.” He smirks, “Looks like someone is /falling for me./”</p><p>“I'm surprised you didn’t make that joke earlier.”</p><p>“Whatever, you Emo Nightmare.”</p><p>I smile a little as Roman pulls me into the middle of the grove. The rest of the day, he attempts to teach me how to waltz, but I just end up tripping over my own feet.</p><p>All in all, it’s a good escape from the stress of everything. And I don’t think I've ever had so much fun, although I'd never admit it outloud.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Thanks for reading!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0014"><h2>14. Cookies and Bagles</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Hey guys, I know there's a lot of stress right now, if you live in the US it's the presidential election and I'm sure everywhere else has problems too, but we'll get through this together!</p><p>That's why I made this chapter Logicality fluff!</p><p>But then my pen slipped, but don't worry theirs only a tiny bit of angst at the beginning! Sorry!</p><p>Anyway, TW: mentions of suicide</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Patton’s POV</p><p>I look down at the photo in my hands and I can feel a tear slide down my cheek.</p><p>No I’m not crying because I'm sad, well maybe I am a little bit, but it’s more of a longing for the past. Specifically sixth grade.</p><p>Everything was a whole lot simpler back then, we just had drama to deal with and that was it. No bargains, no blackmail, no confusing feelings. Just… us.</p><p>The picture is of Logan, Maq and me. We were an inseparable trio back then, always doing everything together. In this one, our arms are around each other’s shoulders and we’re smiling at the camera. The funny part is, the smiles are actually real, not fake.</p><p>Oh, here I go again. I probably shouldn’t be thinking about this.</p><p>Luckily my doorbell rings, I jump up from the couch, quickly wiping away my tears. I rush over to the front entryway and peer through the little window in our door.</p><p>Logan!</p><p>I unlock the door and pull it open.</p><p>“Logan!” I say, jumping on him and hugging the living daylights out of him.</p><p>He sighs, “Patton, you saw me yesterday.”</p><p>“I know but still.” I reluctantly unwrap my arms from his shoulders and beckon him in. “Oh, you should also know that our AC broke yesterday, so renny’s out looking for someone to get it fixed.”</p><p>Logan nods, “I got your text.” He sits on the couch, “I also got the one saying that you need help with your history homework.”</p><p>“Yeah.” I say, rubbing the back of my neck. I feel guilty for lying to him, but I just want to spend as much time with him as possible. “I’ll go get it.”</p><p>I dash upstairs and grab my history binder. When I walk back down, I find Logan looking at the same photo I was. I quietly sit down beside him and open my binder, not wanting to disturb his thoughts.</p><p>“Is that Maq?” He whispers.</p><p>I nod, “That’s sixth grade.”</p><p>He puts down the photo and adjusts his glasses. “Alright, what did you need help with?”</p><p>“It’s okay to be sad you know.” I murmur.</p><p>“I know, I acknowledge that I am sad. Maq was amazing.”</p><p>“I know she was.”</p><p>“We cannot dwell on it now. Homework.”</p><p>For once I agree that we shouldn’t dwell on it, what’s past is past, Maq would have wanted us to get a move on with our lives. But I know that I’ll never forget her.</p><p>For the next hour we go over all of the things that I ‘don’t understand.’ We’re sitting very close to each other, legs and arms touching. When Logan leans over my shoulder to explain something I feel his breath on my neck. It brings a certain redness to my cheeks-</p><p>“Patton? Did you hear me?”</p><p>I snap my head around, Logan’s looking at me with a questioning gaze. </p><p>“What? Oh… sorry.” I say sheepishly.</p><p>He pinches the bridge of his nose, “Please pay attention.”</p><p>“Yeah, yeah I will.”</p><p>Okay. I know I said that I would, but it’s just so hard. It’s almost like Logan is /trying/ to make me fall more in love with him by the minute. Eventually I can’t take it.</p><p>“Umm, I’m going to go make us a snack! Do you want anything?”</p><p>Logan looks at me funny, “No thank you. But hurry back we still have a lot to cover.”</p><p>“Okay!”</p><p>I skip into the kitchen and try to calm my racing heart. Ughh! Why does it do that all the time! Even when I'm trying to do homework!</p><p>Frustrated, I yank open the fridge door, unfortunately I wasn’t paying aware of my surroundings. The door smacks me on the head and I fall to the floor.</p><p>Ow!</p><p>I shut my eyes tight, trying to stop the splitting headache from getting worse. I hear a clatter as Logan rushes into the kitchen.</p><p>“Patton! Are you alright?”</p><p>“Yeah.” I groan and sit up, rubbing my temples.</p><p>He kneels down next to me, “You’re bleeding! Hang on…”</p><p>I feel him pick me up and I land on something soft, probably the couch.</p><p>There’s the opening of a drawer and the water running, then I feel something cold and wet on my forehead. It shocks my eyes into opening.</p><p>The first thing I see is Logan, concern written on his face. A rag hangs down in front of my eyes, obscuring some of my vision.</p><p>“I’m fine Logie.” I mumble, looking away.</p><p>“What happened?” He asks, turning my head back around with a gentle hand.</p><p>“I hit my head on the fridge.” I can feel my cheeks heating up, but I can’t tell if it’s from the stupid mistake I made, or the fact that Logan is mere inches away.</p><p>Logan shakes his head, smiling slightly, and my blush deepens. “What!? It was an accident!”</p><p>“Okay, I don’t think there was too much blood, you should be fine now.” He says after a minute. Yet, he doesn’t move away.</p><p>“Thanks.” I say, somewhat awkwardly.</p><p>“Yeah, anytime.” I avoid eye contact knowing that if I did look at him, my cheeks would turn even more red.</p><p>“Will you look at me?” He asks.</p><p>Darn it.</p><p>Mustering up the courage I glance at him.</p><p>“Are you sure you’re okay? I know that picture might have triggered something.”</p><p>“Yeah, yeah, I’m good.” I can feel my heart beating against my rib cage, I’m almost surprised that Logan can’t hear it.</p><p>He clears his throat and pulls away, “Is that all the things you needed help with?”</p><p>“Umm, I think so?”</p><p>… </p><p>After Logan leaves I flop down on my bed and let out a long sigh.</p><p>“You really like him don’t you?”</p><p>I shoot up and snap my head toward the door. My parent is standing there smiling at me.</p><p>“Wh-what!? No I don’t!”</p><p>“C’mon Pat. I know love when I see it. Just because I’m aromantic, doesn’t mean that I’m oblivious.” They walk over and sit down next to me.</p><p>“Whatever…”</p><p>“So is that a yes?” Jordan nudges my shoulder and I roll my eyes.</p><p>“I guess.”</p><p>“Aha! I win!”</p><p>My cheeks are still bright red, so I bury my head in my knees. “Renny! Stop embarrassing meeee!”</p><p>“Sorry, but that’s my job as a parent. Anyway, how are you going to ask him out?”</p><p>My head shoots back up, “Ask him out! Ren I can’t do that! I’ve known him since kindergarten!”</p><p>Jordan shrugs, “So? It’s pretty obvious that he likes you too.”</p><p>“It is?”</p><p>“Of course! So what are you going to do about it?”</p><p>“I don’t know…”</p><p>“Bagels.”</p><p>“Bagels?”</p><p>“Bagels.”</p><p>… </p><p>Okay. I have a plan today for after school. But, I just gotta get through the day.</p><p>It’s almost torture, I’m practically bursting with energy.</p><p>“Are you okay?” Logan asks, obviously concerned at how excited I am.</p><p>“Of course Logie! I’m perfect!”</p><p>He raises an eyebrow at me, “Okay.”</p><p>After a long seven hours, school is finally over. I hop into my car almost too giddy, “Hey Logan!” I yell out the window as he comes out of the school.</p><p>“Yes?”</p><p>“Will you come over later? I still need help.”</p><p>“But I thought-”</p><p>“K thanks bye!”</p><p>I start my car and leave the parking lot, not giving Logan time to answer. I have to remember to drive carefully, I don’t want to end up like Roman.</p><p>When I pull into the driveway I see Jordan walking into the house with groceries. I rush out to help them, I grab the rest of the bags and walk inside the house.</p><p>“Oh! Hi Pat. I got all the things you need.”</p><p>“Thanks Renny!”</p><p>“Alright, you wanted this to be your thing so I’ll leave you alone for a bit. Tell me when he says yes!”</p><p>“I don’t even know if he will.” I mumble, fiddling with the sleeves of my cardigan.</p><p>Jordan smiles, “How could he say no? Now! Go steal his heart! What was that thing you always used to say? ‘Hippity hoppity, you’re heart is now my property?’”</p><p>“REN, don’t embarrass me!”</p><p>Jordan winks at me, “That’s kind of my job.”</p><p>When Jordan leaves I peer inside the bags of groceries. It’s almost entirely composed of bagels, (and chocolate chip cookies, of course).</p><p>I start by pushing all the furniture in our living room up against the wall. Then I take all the bagels out of their packages, I cut them all in half to make it easier. Next I lay them out in a pattern spelling a certain few words. Fourth, I take the cookies and set them up in a heart shape on the counter. Last but not least, I add a couple of streamers and little red hearts to the ceiling and walls.</p><p>It took almost two hours, but it’ll be worth it.</p><p>I hope.</p><p>As the final step I text Logan asking if he can come over.</p><p>Patton: hey! Can you come over now?</p><p>Logie: I suppose so. Is it for homework purposes?</p><p>Patton: yeah</p><p>Logie: Alright.</p><p>Patton: okay! Yay. I’ll see you here. I gotta go!</p><p>Logie: Got to*. Except the proper grammar would be: have to.</p><p>I shake my head. Logan and his grammar.</p><p>The waiting is probably the worst of it. It gives me time to think about whether or not this is a good idea. As soon as I’m about to call it quits and tell Logan to go back home, I hear a knock on the door.</p><p>My breath catches and my heart rate starts to speed up. It’s now or never. I walk over and open it.</p><p>“Hello Patton. How are you?”</p><p>I don’t say anything; I don’t think I can trust my voice at the moment. Instead I beckon Logan inside.</p><p>He looks at me, confused, but comes in anyway.</p><p>“Patton are you alr-”</p><p>I look down at my feet so I don’t have to see the expression on his face, I have a bad feeling about this.</p><p>There’s a small gasp as Logan sees the room. “Patton…” He whispers.</p><p>I hold my breath and cross my fingers.</p><p>“‘I know this is cream-cheesy but I love you.’” He reads, (Credits to the author’s dad for that one.) and I swear I can hear a small chuckle.</p><p>Nothing happens for several minutes, then I see Logan's very proper shoes walk up to me. My heart is beating almost too fast. </p><p>“Will you look at me?”</p><p>Oh, no. Here we go. I knew I shouldn't have done this! I gather my courage and slowly raise my head. I’m surprised to see Logan smiling at me, his eyes soft.</p><p>It’s even more surprising when he pulls me into a hug. I’m too shocked to hug back.</p><p>“Is-is this a friend hug?” I ask after a moment.</p><p>Logan chuckles again, “No Patton, the feelings are mutual. Although it did take me quite a while to realize.”</p><p>I giggle and wrap my arms around his shoulders, squeezing him tightly. My heart feels like it might explode with happiness. This is finally happening! After so many years, I can finally be open about it.</p><p>I don’t want this hug to ever end!</p><p>But sadly it does, so I grab Logan’s hand and drag him to the kitchen. “C’mon! C’mon! You have to see this!”</p><p>I feel light and giddy, I haven't been this happy in ages! Finally getting my feeling of my chest helped a lot!</p><p>I show Logan the heart cookies and he smiles again, I swear it’s the most beautiful thing. “You really did all this for me?” </p><p>“Yeah! Of course! You’re worth it! Here have one, they’re really good.”</p><p>I hand a blushing Logan a cookie and he takes a bite, “These are rather delicious.” He says, looking thoughtfully down at it.</p><p>“See! I told you!” I grab a cookie of my own and gobble it down. Then I take another, and another.</p><p>“Slow down.” Logan says, amused, “You’re going to get a stomach ache.”</p><p>“But there’s sooooooooooo good!”</p><p>Logan clicks his tongue, “You have cookie crumbs all over your face. Here,”</p><p>He takes a napkin and wipes the corner of my mouth. “Honestly, Patton I-”</p><p>His voice catches and I suddenly realize how close our faces are. His lips are only inches from mine. Our eyes lock.</p><p>So close… </p><p>Now he’s leaning in, and my heart jumps to my throat. Logan stops centimeters away from my lips, “Are-are you sure?” He breathes, sounding hesitant.</p><p>“I’ve never been more sure.”</p><p>He closes the gap and my eyelids flutter shut. As soon as our lips connect it’s pure bliss. He cups my cheeks softly, kissing me slowly. I wrap my arms around his waist and pull him closer.</p><p>He takes my breath and steals my mind. I grip his shirt, not wanting to let go. Logan makes me feel wanted, understood, loved. Something not everyone can do. But he had no trouble finding his way into my heart.</p><p>Suddenly the door of the kitchen opens. I jump back and trip over my own feet, landing with a thump on the tile floor.</p><p>“Oh sorry.” Jordan says with a smirk, “Am I interrupting something.”</p><p>I can feel a blush rising in my cheeks as Logan helps me up. “N-no! Not at all!”</p><p>My parent raises an eyebrow, “So you’re plan worked then?”</p><p>“You could say that,” Logan says adjusting his tie, “Although I'm not sure what the ‘plan’ was.”</p><p>I look fondly at him, “It was just confessing my feelings.”</p><p>“Alright, break it up you two love-birds. I'm too aro for this.” Jordan says, pretending to gag.</p><p>“But we’re not even doing anything!” I protest.</p><p>Logan looks confused, “What are ‘love-birds’?”</p><p>Jordan shakes their head, “Patton, you’ve sure chosen a smart one.”</p><p>I gaze sternly at them, “Don’t say that! Logan’s plenty smart!”</p><p>Logan squints at us, “Isn’t that what they said?”</p><p>“Yeah- well- never mind. Let’s just finish these cookies!”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Thanks for reading, and don't worry, we'll be okay.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0015"><h2>15. The one where everything is revealed</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Oof. That’s all I’m gonna say.</p><p>TW: I don’t think there’s any.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Roman’s POV</p><p>Maybe Virgil’s right… maybe I /should/ talk to Remus. He said in the video that he loved me, and maybe that’s true.</p><p>So if I talk to him, what would he tell me? Would he admit anything? Or would he just blow it off? He’d probably do that, what i need is evidence-</p><p>The video!</p><p>The video was perfect evidence!</p><p>I pull out my phone and click on Patton’s contact.</p><p>Royal Rollo: Hey Pat? You there?</p><p>Patton-cake: Yeah! What do you need kiddo?</p><p>Royal Rollo: Do you still have that video?</p><p>Patton-cake: Yeah, do u need it?</p><p>Royal Rollo: Yep, can you send it?</p><p>Patton-cake: sure, but just make sure you don’t get too worked up over it k?</p><p>Royal Rollo: Got it Padre!</p><p>Patton-cake: here it is. (videoattachment)</p><p>Royal Rollo: Thanks!</p><p>I click on the video to make sure it’s the right one. It is.</p><p>Okay… I’m going to do it. But I should tell Virgil what I’m doing.</p><p>Princey: Hey.</p><p>Sunshine: yeah?</p><p>Princey: I’m gonna do it.</p><p>Sunshine: talk to remus?</p><p>Princey: Yep.</p><p>Sunshine: okay, good luck (you might need it), do you want me to be there?</p><p>Princey: No, this is something I have to do alone. This is gonna go well… definitely… </p><p>Sunshine: wow, roman don’t get too excited!</p><p>Princey: whatever</p><p>Sunshine: no uppercase! holy shit, you must really be excited.</p><p>Princey: Thanks for trying to lighten the mood babe.</p><p>Sunshine: eww, don't call me that!</p><p>Princey: Babe, babe, babe, babe, babe. Baby, baby, baby, baby.</p><p>Sunshine: ughh! shut uppppppppppppppppp!</p><p>Princey: Baby, babe, babe, babe</p><p>Sunshine: just go talk to remus already!</p><p>Princey: Okay bye babe.❤️😘</p><p>Sunshine: disgusting, romance and emojis? gross.</p><p>Princey: Luv u too!</p><p>I chuckle at Virgil’s hate of anything romantic. He’s honestly quite the opposite of me, and you know what they say: ‘opposites attract’. And I love it.</p><p>I stand up and stretch. Am I actually going to confront Remus? I have to right? But I don’t want to. I should probably do it before I have time to procrastinate.</p><p>I muster up my courage and walk out of my room. Remus’ room is just down the hall so I don’t have far to go. I pause outside his door, here we go… I need to fix this whole mess.</p><p>I knock a couple of times and I hear Remus’ voice from inside. “Who is it?”</p><p>“It-it’s Roman.”</p><p>“What the hell do you want?”</p><p>The door opens and Remus is standing there with an annoyed look on his face. Although… there’s bags under his eyes, and he looks like he hasn’t slept in days.</p><p>“Hellooooooooo. Earth to the theater nerd. What do you want, I’m busy.”</p><p>“Doing what? Dealing drugs.”</p><p>Remus’ expression turns frustrated, “Go away Roman. I’m serious. You’re forgetting who has the upper hand here.”</p><p>I raise an eyebrow, attempting to look intimidating, “Really. I have something that might shock you.”</p><p>I walk into Remus’ room without an invitation which is a big no-no in our family.</p><p>“Hey!” He protests. I ignore him and pull up the video Patton sent me.</p><p>I hand him my phone, “You might want to take a look at this.”</p><p>Remus looks at me confused, before pressing play. I watch white a stony expression as his face loses all color.</p><p>“How’d you get this?” He whispers, not taking his eyes off the screen.</p><p>“It doesn’t matter. What matters is what you said.”</p><p>Remus looks back up at me, outwardly he looks angry, but I can see a hint of fear in his gaze. His whole personality changes in two seconds flat. “You have to delete this!”</p><p>“What!? No!? You can’t tell me what to do anymore! You don’t have any control.”</p><p>“Roman, you don’t understand… we could get in so much trouble if anyone sees this.”</p><p>“Yeah, that’s the point. You have dirt on me, I have dirt on you. If you reveal anything, I’ll reveal something else. It’s honestly just a jumble of secrets and lies. Sure you can frame me for dealing drugs, but I can search your room for evidence that you did it. And before you say that you can out me, I’ll out myself. I’m not scared anymore.”</p><p>“That’s not the problem! It-it’s more complicated than that!” I see Remus try to press the delete button. But I snatch my phone back before he can.</p><p>“How is it more complicated than that!? It’s just about as complicated as it can get, it’s like the author doesn't even know what they're doing!”</p><p>“I know but- wait the author?”</p><p>“Yeah, the author of this- oh well, nevermind. How is it more complicated!?”</p><p>“Look, deleting that video is the only thing we can do at this point.” Remus snaps, “Virgil'll have no fend for himself.”</p><p>“What!?” I’m yelling at this point.</p><p>Remus slaps a hand over his mouth. “Shit. Just forget I said anything.”</p><p>“Fat chance!” I hiss, advancing. “You just told me that my BOYFRIEND has to fend for himself. And now you expect me to just forget it!?”</p><p>“Look, Roman I-”</p><p>“I honestly can’t believe you! All you care about is drugs, money and yourself! You’re just so SELFISH! Do you not care how anyone feels! You throw your weight around like you’re not affecting anyone! It’s bullshit.”</p><p>“Just listen-”</p><p>“And you know what Remus, that’s why everyone hates you! Patton hates you! Virgil hates you! Our moms hate you. Logan hates you! I FUCKING /HATE/ YOU REMUS!!!”</p><p>“ROMAN SHUT UP! I’M DOING THIS TO PROTECT YOU!”</p><p>“Right. I’m a cow. Why should I believe that you’re doing anything to protect me!?” I spit, glaring at my brother with all of the spite that I have.</p><p>“You just have to trust me!”</p><p>“Excuse me!? After everything you’ve done, you expect me to /trust you?/ are you stupid?”</p><p>“Janus is planning something and I have to help him otherwise, you could go to jail!”</p><p>What?</p><p>I stare at him, stunned. “Wh-what's he planning?”</p><p>I can tell that Remus is on the verge of telling me everything, “Remus. Please tell me I’m sure we can figure it out.” I say quietly.</p><p>He looks at me for a long time, then it all comes spilling out.</p><p>“Janus found out that I was dealing drugs, and threatened to tell the police if i didn’t help him.”</p><p>“With what?”</p><p>I see Remus take a deep breath. “He’s trying to get you arrested.”</p><p>Holy shit.</p><p>“What the hell? Why me?”</p><p>“He’s trying to frame you in a bad light so Virgil would go back to him! He was the mastermind behind the slime prank! He wanted me to blackmail you into keeping it a secret, and he was counting on you trying to tell everyone that I did it, so he could have me claim it was false! And then he had these fake tapes showing that you were the one rigging the buckets and taking the drugs!</p><p>“But unfortunately I found a really good piece of blackmail that kept you quiet! So he was stuck because it was obvious that Virgil was still head-over-heels for you!</p><p>“So Janus planned another crime, planning to frame you for it again… but I said that he couldn’t. Cause I saw you trying to commit suicide! And that scared me. So Janus just settled for framing Virgil and getting revenge!”</p><p>Holy fucking shit.</p><p>No way.</p><p>Why?</p><p>I stay silent for a long time, trying to process everything I heard.</p><p>“See why we need to delete the video?” Remus asks quietly. “If he knows that you have this, he’ll for sure frame you. All we can do now is hope that Virgil doesn’t get into too much trouble.”</p><p>“No! I won’t let Janus get away with this. He’s not going to frame my boyfriend. We'll figure something out.”</p><p>Remus looks unconvinced, so I put a hand on his shoulder. “I’m sure we’ll think of something.”</p><p>He nods his head, glumly. And for the first time in a while, I feel bad for him. If this is hard for me, I can’t imagine being in his position. Suddenly, I get an idea.</p><p>“Do you know where he’s planning to do this?” I ask.</p><p>“Yes. Why?”</p><p>“We can catch him in the act! Video whatever he’s going to do!”</p><p>“But Janus probably has fake footage too.”</p><p>“Exactly, but… we can go live.”</p><p>“Live?”</p><p>“On Instagram! If we video what he’s doing live, people will know it’s not fake!” I exclaim excitedly.</p><p>Remus looks thoughtful, “You know… that just might work…”</p><p>I pick my phone back up, and dial a number. “Don’t worry Remus, we can still get out of this mess.”</p><p>… </p><p>Half an hour later, we’re sitting in Patton’s living room. His parent is at work so we have the house to ourselves.</p><p>Virgil is the first one to say anything, “What the hell is he doing here.”</p><p>I take his hand in a calming gesture, “It’s okay. We have some explaining to do.”</p><p>Virgil glares at Remus, “You sure do.”</p><p>I cast a glance at Remus, he gives a small nod, indicating that I can say as much as I need to. So I do. The whole time everyone is quiet, they’re probably too shocked to say anything.</p><p>When I finish I can see tears slipping down Patton’s face. Virgil’s staring at me, and Logan looks speechless for once.</p><p>“Holy fuck.” He whispers finally. The situation is so dire that Patton doesn't even correct him for language.</p><p>I look to Remus who had been silent the whole time, “We need to figure out what to do… and we know a little. But Remus, you have to be the hero here.”</p><p>His eyes are hollow as he looks back at me, “/Sure/. And when have I ever done a good job of that? I made you try to commit suicide, what kind of ‘hero’ does that? I won’t be much help, trust me.”</p><p>“That’s bullshit, you know the most about this. And… I know I act like it… but I don’t actually hate you. It was hard to like you when you were blackmailing me, but I never stopped loving you.”</p><p>My twin looks me in the eye and I can see that under the years of bickering and fighting, was real genuine love. He blinks and I can no longer see it, but I know it’s there.</p><p>“Thank you.” He whispers.</p><p>I nod, “You and Virgil are the ones who know the most about Janus.” When I mention my boyfriend’s name I turn to him.</p><p>“I know it might be hard to-”</p><p>“No. I can do this. If Janus wants trouble then that’s what he’ll get.” There’s a steely look in his eyes that sends shivers down my spine.</p><p>“We need to form a plan.” Logan cuts in. “I assume you have something in mind?”</p><p>I explain my plan to everyone, and they all seem to be on board with it.</p><p>I look around the room and see everyone’s determined faces, “Are we ready?”</p><p>No one is hesitant when they say ‘yes.’</p><p>It’s time to catch a snake.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0016"><h2>16. Let’s Go</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Okay! This chapters going up! The one we’ve all been waiting for. Whew, it was intense. But I had such a fun time writing it!</p><p>TW: none</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Roman’s POV</p><p>I chew my nail as Patton and Logan walk away. Virgil’s hand finds mine and he gives it a small squeeze, “We can do this Roman.”</p><p>“I hope you're right.”</p><p>“Roman?”</p><p>“Yeah?”</p><p>I watch Virgil fiddle with his hoodie sleeves. “Just know that whatever happens… I love you.”</p><p>My heart jumps in my chest, “I love you too Virge.”</p><p>I pull him into a hug, running my hands up and down his back.</p><p>Someone clears their throat behind me. I turn to see Remus standing there with his phone. “I sent you the address.”</p><p>I give him a nod of thanks and pull out my own phone. I see the address in my text messages from him. Virgil and I start to walk towards Logan’s car, but Remus grabs my wrist before I can get very far.</p><p>“Just… be careful okay? Janus is… a lot. And I don’t want you dying. You’re the best twin I could have asked for.”</p><p>I smile at him, “Don’t worry, we will be. I probably don’t know half of what Janus can do. So that’s why I’ll be extra careful.”</p><p>“Thank you.”</p><p>With a hasty goodbye, Virgil and I climb into Logan’s car. (Our moms are currently at work on their night shifts, so we need to use this.) I plug in my phone and punch the address into google maps.</p><p>Most of the ride we’re silent, aware of the looming threat that hangs over our heads. It’s an extremely tense atmosphere, and I desperately want to get out of it.</p><p>Virgil’s hand is still clutched in mine and I squeeze it, trying to calm my nerves. He looks over at me, “I won’t let him hurt you Roman. He’s hurt me too much, and I won’t let that happen to you.”</p><p>“But he’s going to try and frame you!”</p><p>“We don’t know that. Remus might not have been able to convince him. And besides, who trusts Janus to keep his word anyway? So he could very well still be framing you.”</p><p>I don’t answer. He’s right, Janus probably won't keep his word. If this fails I might go to jail.</p><p>Then my GPS beeps.</p><p>Let’s go.</p><p>Logan’s POV</p><p>Patton and I walk away from Virgil and Roman, who are standing on the driveway. As we walk into the darkness they seem nervous, and rightly so. If this plan fails, both of them might end up in prison.</p><p>“Will they be okay?” Patton asks quietly, taking my hand and fiddling with my fingers.</p><p>“I hope so.”</p><p>I feel Patton's arms wrap around my torso as we walk. I glance down at him. He looks frightened, and I can’t blame him. The situation is rather frightening. I can’t stand to see him like this, Janus will pay for making him feel like this. I don’t usually look for vengeance, but Janus has gone too far this time.</p><p>“Logan?” Patton asks, shaking me out of my thoughts.</p><p>“Yes?”</p><p>“When did you first realize that you liked me?”</p><p>I have to think about that, it’s a hard question to answer. Not because it’s hard to say, but because the answer isn’t exactly a straight one.</p><p>“I think my subconscious already knew. It just took my brain a while to catch up. The time I really knew was a few days ago, when we were playing Chutes and Ladders.”</p><p>Patton laughs, “It really took you that long?”</p><p>I can feel my cheeks heat up, and I know I’m blushing. “Well, I’m not exactly the most emotional person.”</p><p>“I know.” Patton giggles and leans up, giving me a small kiss on the nose.</p><p>I didn’t think it was possible, but my face seems to be getting even more red.</p><p>Patton takes my hand as we walk down the sidewalk, “It’ll be okay.” He whispers, probably more to himself than me. “It has to be.”</p><p>I look up and see a huge brick building looming in front of us.</p><p>It’s time.</p><p>“Are you ready?” I ask, without turning.</p><p>“Yes.”</p><p>Patton and I walk into the police station.</p><p>The person at the counter looks up and spots us. “Boys? What are you doing here? Is there an emergency?”</p><p>“Yes.” I say.</p><p>“Okay where? I’ll send some people down there.” The person says, reaching for the phone.</p><p>“Wait.” I take a deep breath, knowing that my request is unusual, they might not listen. “Have them come down here. You need to see this first. Please. It’s the only way to catch him.”</p><p>The person looks at me and seems to make a quick decision, they pick up the phone and dial a number. </p><p>Soon Patton and I are surrounded by police officers. He squeezes my hand tightly, and I squeeze back.</p><p>I pull my phone out of my pocket, “Let’s go.”</p><p>Remus’ POV</p><p>I watch Roman and Virgil drive off and hop in one of my mom’s cars. I hope they’ll all be okay. Especially Roman. I don’t know what I’d do if something bad happened. I don’t even want to think about it.</p><p>I take my phone and plug in the aux cord. I need some music to distract me.</p><p>I click on my favorite playlist and start the car. The first song that comes on is ‘The Things We Used to Share’ by Thomas Sanders.</p><p>He’s actually a pretty great musician, and he has the same last name as me, pretty cool right? I listen to a lot of his songs, there’s this one called 'Forbidden Fruit’, it’s probably my favorite. The dude singing it sounds like my kind of person too.</p><p>I know Thomas does YouTube too, but I’ve never really watched any of his videos. I think he has this series called ‘Sides of Thomas’ or whatever (I don’t really know the exact name). So I should probably check it out.</p><p>I drive for a while before I see a street sign reading 'Vevarona Lane’, I turn into the neighborhood.</p><p>I’m the only one on the street, as it is almost twelve am. I pass house after house until I come to a yellow one.</p><p>Janus’ uncle lives here. I have to be careful, Janus usually comes to school with a ton of makeup on. I knew he was hiding something. Then one time he ran out of makeup.</p><p>By the look of those bruises, he didn’t get them from falling down the stairs.</p><p>So I need to be in and out quickly. My job is to find the fake tapes that Janus used before, and try to find the ones that he made this time. If he made any, which I’m sure he did.</p><p>Luckily, I know a back way in.</p><p>I park the car a ways away from the house, it might be harder to escape, but at least it’s not too suspicious. Walking towards the yellow house I check to make sure I have everything.</p><p>Flashlight?<br/>Check.</p><p>Lock pick?<br/>Check.</p><p>Phone?<br/>Check.</p><p>Pickled Poo Logs?<br/>Check.</p><p>Alright.</p><p>Let’s go.</p><p>Virgil’s POV</p><p>The GPS gives a beep and I look out the window to see an old warehouse.</p><p>Of course. It has to be this. Really Janus? It’s so clique.</p><p>“Ready?” I ask.</p><p>Roman nods and takes out his phone. He clicks on Instagram with shaking hands, then he puts his phone down. “We need to wait for Logan’s signal.”</p><p>I nod and sit back in my seat. I feel like throwing up. It’s probably my anxiety.</p><p>I feel Roman’s hand close on mine again. “Hey. It’s going to be okay Virge. I promise. We’ll catch him.”</p><p>I can tell that he’s trying to convince himself as much as me.</p><p>I feel my phone buzz and I look down at it.</p><p>“‘We’re ready.’ from ‘Pocket Protector’”, flashes across my Lock Screen.</p><p>Roman see’s it too and clicks the live button on Instagram. He doesn’t say anything, just climbs out of the car and points the camera at the warehouse.</p><p>I climb out too. “We only have an hour, so we have to be quick.” I warn. He nods silently.</p><p>We creep around the back of the large building and I spot a door. I point to it. Roman raises an eyebrow questioningly, and I nod. It’s now or never.</p><p>I press an ear to the door, but hear nothing. I slowly turn the knob and push it open. I scan the space before me, looking for signs of Janus. There's none. Turning around I motion for Roman to take his shoes off. The floor is concrete and shoes would make too much noise.</p><p>Slipping off my own shoes I step into the warehouse, it’s dark except for a small light in the far corner. I hear Roman come through the door behind me, and I tread carefully, knowing that the slightest noise will alert Janus that we’re here.</p><p>Roman and I slink along the shelves of boxes and crates, getting closer and closer to the light.</p><p>“Deceit! Get your ass over here.”</p><p>The voice comes from just beside us, I freeze. Roman dives under one of the crates and pulls me in after him. I peer out, my heart thumping in my chest.</p><p>Someone in an all black outfit with an orange mask and gloves comes out from behind a shelf. They’re holding a… painting?</p><p>“What is it?” Hisses another voice. That’s Janus. He walks up to Orange.</p><p>“Are you sure this is the right one?” Orange asks.</p><p>Janus looks down at the painting, “Remus gave it to me. He said it was Roman’s. So it has to be.”</p><p>I hear Roman suck in a breath beside me. I wonder what that’s about… </p><p>“God Deceit. Couldn't you have gotten a different DNA sample?”</p><p>“Look.” Janus snaps, “We’re not exactly buddy-buddy, this is the best I have. Just… do whatever you need to, you can rip it up if you have to.”</p><p>Roman stiffens, I glance at him. But he’s looking straight ahead, still pointing the phone at the two criminals.</p><p>“You know…” Orange says, “I think that the tapes will be enough to fool the cops. I mean, they might think that someone framed them. I don’t think that they would think that anyone is stupid enough to leave any traces of their presence, especially a straight A student.”</p><p>Janus squints at Orange, then rolls his eyes. “Whatever. We’ll just use the tapes then.”</p><p>Orange folds up the piece of paper and slips it into they’re back pocket, Roman flinches. I want to ask about it, but we have more pressing matters at hand.</p><p>Roman trains the camera Janus as he and Orange walk away. He leans over to me and whispers, “We should follow them.”</p><p>I nod uneasily, technically we don’t have too, the police already have enough information. But I also want to know what they’re planning.</p><p>Roman and I crawl after the two, hiding under crates and behind boxes. They walk down to the end of the rows of shelves, Janus picks up a bag and Orange takes something off a shelf. “We need to get the last of it in here.” They say.</p><p>Roman’s phone vibrates (thank god he put it on silent mode) we look down at it to see a comment from Logan. ‘The police have been dispatched. They should be there soon. Try to keep Janus busy until then.’</p><p>Roman looks at me fearfully, “Are we going to do this?” He asks.</p><p>I look back and forth from him and Janus. “Yes. We need to. I need to. You need to. It’s the only way to get out of this.”</p><p>Roman gulps, “Alright. We’ll do it.”</p><p>I stand up with Roman next to me. Taking a deep breath, I walk around the box we were hiding behind. Janus’ head snaps up and he spots me.</p><p>“What’re you doing?” I ask, advancing. My hands are sweating and my heart is beating too fast, but there’s something inside of me that’s pushing me forward.</p><p>Orange throws another bag at Janus, “Take it and go. They have no evidence!”</p><p>Janus takes the bag looking conflicted, then he runs. Orange starts toward me, cracking his knuckles, I stand my ground. If I have to fight I will.</p><p>But before Orange can throw the first punch, something slams into his chest, blowing him over and holding him down.</p><p>I step back in shock as Roman punches Orange in the mouth. “Go!” He yells, “Make sure Janus doesn’t get away!”</p><p>My feet feel rooted to the ground as Orange throws Roman off themself. “GO! I’LL BE FINE!” His eyes meet mine for a split second, “I promise.”</p><p>His promise spurs me into action, and my feet move again. I sprint after Janus, flying over the ground. I dodge shelves, and duck under boxes he sends flying back at me. This is faster than I’ve ever run, I expect to tire quickly, but adrenaline is causing me to have endless energy.</p><p>I’m feet away from Janus down, I put on a burst of speed and grab the back of his shirt. We both go tumbling to the ground.</p><p>Somehow I land on top and I manage to hold him down. “Why are you doing this?” I ask as he struggles.</p><p>He stops and looks me in the eye, “Why? Why do you want to know?”</p><p>I make sure not to relax my arms as I sigh. “You were so different before… What changed? Why would you do something like this?”</p><p>Janus sneers, although it isn’t as effective because he’s breathing heavily, “I don’t have to tell you anything.”</p><p>“True. You don’t have to, but I just want to know what happened after I left.”</p><p>I feel Janus go limp, but I don’t let go. It could be a trick. “It broke me.” He says hoarsely, “I loved you Virgil… I still do.”</p><p>I narrow my eyes at him, he seems sincere. He seems like he’s telling the truth. He seems like he loves me. But there's something in his eyes… something cold… something that tells me he’s changed beyond repair.</p><p>“Liar.” I hiss. “You liar. You don’t miss me. You don’t love me. Maybe you did, but you don’t anymore. You’ve changed too much.”</p><p>Janus’ gaze hardens, confirming my suspensions. “Whatever.” He spits, “You still have no evidence. And I can still frame you.”</p><p>I smirk at him, “Right. Sure thing Jan. Except for the fact that Roman was live on Instagram the whole time. And guess what? We had some very special guests watching tonight. And they just so happen to be the ones that enforce the law.”</p><p>All color drains from Janus’ face. I hear sirens wailing and smile. They're here.</p><p>“Police! Put your hands up!”</p><p>Everything happens so quickly. And in a blur, I’m standing next to Roman. He’s cradling an arm, he has a black eye and a busted lip. But other than that he looks fine, relieved even. I pull him into a hug. “We did it.” He whispers, squeezing me tight.</p><p>I drop my head onto his shoulder, “That was so brave.”</p><p>“No. You were. I know it must have been hard for you to face him.” Roman leans back and looks at me, “It was incredibly brave.”</p><p>I blush a little, “It wasn’t that brave, I just-”</p><p>“Shut up emo.” Roman smiles at me fondly. I purse my lips as my face gets redder.</p><p>Behind Roman’s back, I see Janus being led away by a police officer. He glares at me, and I glare back. Although it’s a somewhat sad glare. He had so much potential, but he just changed too much.</p><p>When Roman and I pull away, he smiles, “With the fake tapes that Remus gets we’ll have even more evidence. Then Janus will for sure be busted.”</p><p>“Yeah… you do realize that he will get in trouble too right?”</p><p>Roman’s smile dims, “Yeah. I know he will. And he knows too. But it would be worse if he came with Janus tonight.”</p><p>“Your right. Hopefully it won't be too bad.”</p><p>Roman pulls out his phone, “Speaking of my brother… where is he? I haven't heard from him yet.”</p><p>Roman and I look at eachother and I suddenly have a bad feeling at the pit of my stomach. Something isn't right.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>There you have it! The big fight scene. (Sorry about the cliffhanger.)</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0017"><h2>17. Tea Time</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Next chapter, here we go. Wow, it’s been a while since I’ve posted on a Saturday, sorry about that.</p><p>TW: none, possibly violence?</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Remus’ POV</p><p>I creep around the back of the house, I’ve only been here once before. And I've never been inside. Maybe this isn't the best plan…</p><p>Welp. Too late now. I made a promise.</p><p>I walk around the house several times, careful to avoid the windows, until I finally find the tiny trap door that Janus showed me. I open it, and freeze when it creaks loudly. I listen for sounds of steps. There’s none.</p><p>Letting out a breath, I open the door the rest of the way. I crawl inside and peer around. I’m in a living room. Dust covers most of the furniture and there are broken bottles and glass covering the floor. The TV is cracked in the side and a hole in the wall signals that someone might have punched it.</p><p>But there’s no sign of life, so I slip in the rest of the way. Now, all I need to do is find Janus’ room, then get those tapes.</p><p>I slink up the stairs, trying to be as quiet as I can. At the top there are three doors down a hallway, two of them are open. There’s a bathroom and a bedroom, the bedroom looks dark and grimy. So that’s definitely not Janus’.</p><p>I turn to the last door and slowly push it open. Inside I find a small bed, a desk with a chair in the corner covered with pictures, and a half packed suitcase. The rest of the room is bare.</p><p>So this must be where Janus does all his evil scheming. It’s actually quite cozy, but why was he packing?</p><p>I walk across to the desk, I see several pictures. There’s an older couple holding a smiling baby boy, I assume that’s Janus and his parents. The next picture is of Roman, it’s a yearbook picture. On the back of it there’s several different notes about him. Where he goes after school, who he knows, etc.</p><p>All of it is information I gave him.</p><p>The guilt hits like a fist to my stomach and I move on.</p><p>The next picture is of Virgil and Janus, they’re sitting under an apple tree. Janus is holding an apple away from Virgil while he tries to grab it. They’re both laughing.</p><p>There are several other pictures of Janus’ friends and family, but he seems to keep the ones with Virgil in them far from the others. I wonder why.</p><p>Great. Shit, I’m getting sidetracked. I have to find the tapes.</p><p>If I were Janus where would I hide a fake piece of evidence?</p><p>I search everywhere. Under the bed, in the suitcase, in the closet. But it’s nowhere.</p><p>I guess there’s one more place to look…</p><p>I walk back over to the desk. I sift through the photos again, and my hand hits something hard. I grab it.</p><p>It’s an envelope, inside is a hard drive.</p><p>Bingo.</p><p>I turn to leave, but just as I do my butt hits the chair and it falls with a bang.</p><p>Ugh!</p><p>Fuck my bodacious backside! (Literally too, it’s been a while since I’ve been pounded.)</p><p>I hear feet thump up the stairs and I freeze, shoving the hard drive down my pants. I can’t let anyone know that I have it.</p><p>I scan the room, frantically looking for somewhere to hide. But there is none. Not knowing what else to do, I pull out my phone and click on the first contact I have. I quickly punch in a word and an address.</p><p>Just as Janus’ door slams open, I slip my phone back in my pocket. A big burly man is standing in the doorway, when he sees me he glares.</p><p>I walk slowly away from him. But my back presses against the wall.</p><p>The man advances, and raises a hand.</p><p>I close my eyes bracing for an impact. This is not the pounding that I meant!</p><p>Roman’s POV</p><p>Virgil looks fearfully at me, and I know something’s wrong.</p><p>I feel my phone buzz and I pull it out of my pocket. There's a text from Remus.</p><p>‘Help.’</p><p>Then an address.</p><p>Shit.</p><p>Virgil starts to panic so I put a hand on his shoulder. “It’s going to be alright.” I say, “We’ll find him.”</p><p>I walk up to one of the officers, “Excuse me?”</p><p>The officer turns around, “Yes? Did you need a ride home or something?” She asks.</p><p>I shake my head, “We do need a ride, but to this address, my brother is trapped there.”</p><p>“Trapped?”</p><p>“Yeah, at least I think so. I just got this from him,” I hold up my phone and show her the text, “I don’t think he had time to dial 911, and he has an important piece of evidence.”</p><p>Okay, that part was a lie, I don’t actually know if he has the evidence, but I need to find him.</p><p>The officer nods and calls to the others. Soon Virgil and I are seated in the back of a cop car, with two others behind us.</p><p>I give the officer the address and she punches it into her GPS. When we turn into the neighborhood, she turns off the sirens and lights.</p><p>“We don’t want them to be suspicious, as we don't know how dangerous it is.” She explains.</p><p>We drive past the house with the address so as not to raise suspicion, and then I spot my mom’s car. I point to it, “There! That’s my brother’s car!”</p><p>The officer pulls over. “Alright, you boys stay in here, we’ll be back.”</p><p>She gets out of the car and signals the other three officers. I watch as they walk to the door.</p><p>I turn to Virgil, but before I can say anything he sighs, “We’re not actually going to stay here are we.”</p><p>I shake my head, “No way.”</p><p>He rolls his eyes, “C’mon, lets go.”</p><p>Virgil and I step out of the back of the cop car and follow the officers to the door. One of them turns to me, “You're supposed to stay in the car!”</p><p>I glare at him, “My brother’s in there. I want to make sure he’s okay.”</p><p>“Leave it, Patti.” Says the officer that drove us here, “We have more important things to worry about.”</p><p>“But-but, protocol!” Officer Patti stutters.</p><p>The officer shakes her head, “C’mon, let’s just bust in quick.”</p><p>The four cops get in position, then Patti opens the door. “Police put your hands up!”</p><p>The other three run after him, I grab Virgil’s hand and go in too. My anxiety is spiking, how are we going to find Remus? Is he okay?</p><p>I look over the officer’s shoulder and gasp at the sight that greets me.</p><p>Remus is sitting in the middle of a dirty living room, teacup in hand, pinky up and laughing at something an older man said.</p><p>When Remus sees the cops he looks surprised, “What are you doing here?” He asks, raising an eyebrow.</p><p>The cops look confused, “We got a tip-off that you might be in trouble.” Patti says, and gestures to me.</p><p>Remus creases his brow, “But I- Oooohhhhhh, oh yeah! Nevermind Roman, I don’t need help. I’m good, Alexander and I were just having a little chat over tea.”</p><p>I honestly don’t know what to say.</p><p>“You drink tea?”</p><p>Nice going Roman, that’s got to be the least relevant part here. Jesus.</p><p>One of the officers steps forward, “Remus, are you sure you’re okay, because we cannot conduct a search on his house without a warrant.”</p><p>The man, supposedly Alexander waves his hand, “No, no go ahead. It’s rather dusty in here though. And I might have accidentally broken a few root beer bottles from the VR disaster. I punched a hole through my wall trying to kill a zombie.” He points to a fist-sized hole in the wall and smiles.</p><p>Okay… this is weird.</p><p>The police look even more puzzled then before, but they don’t say anything. Instead they walk around the house, examining tables and chairs, sniffing broken bottles etc.</p><p>All the while Remus and Alexander are chuckling at their own jokes, not knowing what else to do, I walk up to both of them.</p><p>“Hey Roman! Hey Virge!” Remus says cheerily, taking a sip of his tea. “I suppose you’ll want to know what happened.”</p><p>“Umm yup. Tell me what the fuck actually happened.”</p><p>Remus nodded to Alexander, indicating that he should be the one to tell me. “Well, I saw Remus here snooping around my nephew Janus’ room, then I saw a piece of lint in his shirt so I tried to take it off, but he just freaked out and punched me. I explained what I was doing and he apologized a lot, so I told him he was all good, and that it happens all the time.</p><p>“I invited him to tea and we talked a bit, that’s when Remus asked where Janus got the bruises, I told him it was from wrestling. And the reason Janus covered them was because his coach sees bruises as a sign of weakness. Trust me I’ve tried to pull him out of it, but Janus won’t listen, wrestling is like his emotional outlet. But it still makes me feel guilty because I promised his mom and dad that I would keep him safe.</p><p>“Remus told me everything. The blackmail, the stealing, the drugs. This kid really needed to talk to someone.” He reaches over and ruffles my twin brother’s hair. I try not to be too appalled. Then Alexander’s face falls.</p><p>“I never thought Janus was that kind of kid. He was so happy before, but when he came to live with me this school year he seemed… different. Like he changed. We used to do so many things together whenever I visited Minnesota. He was the light in my life when my wife died, we would play rugby and wrestle in his yard whenever we had the chance. He kept me from drinking and smoking (that’s how I became addicted to root beer) he was a good kid or who cared about his family.</p><p>“But when he showed up here for the first time in a year. I could tell that he had changed. He never wanted to play any sport, he would always have his creepy friends over. He just became distant with me I guess. He never even once joined a VR game with me. He used to love that…”</p><p>I can see that Alexander’s eyes were starting to get wet. He roughly wipes them and turns to Virgil, “He keeps so many pictures of you close to his desk. I can hear him crying sometimes, and every time he’s holding a picture of you. But then again, sometimes I find that he’s ripped out your face and scribbled all over it.”</p><p>I feel Virgil move closer to me, I instinctively grab his hand.</p><p>Alexander notices, “Ahh, I see. That’s why. Well, I am definitely disappointed in my nephew. And I will tell the court everything they need to know. I just want the truth now.”</p><p>We’re all silent for a long time, until Remus puts a hand on Alexander’s shoulder, “Don’t worry Alex, I’m sure we’ll figure this out.”</p><p>Alex nods, “I just want him to know that I still love him no matter what.”</p><p>I hear someone clear their throat beside us. “Umm, the search has been conducted. We found nothing.” Patti says, “We will inform you, as Janus Dolin’s guardian for the time being, the time of the trials and cases, we will also be informing his parents.”</p><p>Virgil leans his head on my shoulder, “We did it.” He whispers.</p><p>I sigh, relieved “Yes. We did. We’re safe. You’re safe.”</p><p>Virgil slaps me in the arm, “Sap.”</p><p>“Mhm, ssuuurrre. You’re the one that started this whole conversation with the words: ‘We did it.’”</p><p>“Shut up.” Virgil sounds annoyed but I can tell that he’s grinning.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Welp, the story is drawing to a close. It’s been so fun honestly.</p>
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<a name="section0018"><h2>18. The End</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Okay, here it is: the final chapter...</p><p>TW: none</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>…A few months later… </p><p>“Remus! We’re going to the play! We’ll make sure to record it for you!” My mom yells down the hall.</p><p>Remus is sitting on the couch flipping through channels with a bored look on his face. “Fine. Good luck Roman.”</p><p>“Thanks bro.” I say, jumping over both him and the couch in an attempt to get to the door quickly. “Don’t worry, only a couple more weeks right?”</p><p>He nods and waves me off, “Go! You have a play!”</p><p>“I know I know! But-”</p><p>“Roman Sanders if we don’t get out this door in the next thirty seconds-”</p><p>“Coming mom! Bye Rem!”</p><p>“Ughhh!” Remus groans as I dash out of the door, “I told you not to call me that!”</p><p>I laugh and jump in the backseat of my mom’s car. I can’t wait! After everything happened with Janus we had to find a new Dr. Facilier, and guess what! Turns out Virgil’s actually an amazing singer! So I told him to try out for the role when we reheld the auditions. And he got the part!</p><p>He also explained to Picani that wearing yellow is a trigger for him because Janus always wore yellow, (Picani is a therapist as a side job), so he totally understood. We were able to switch up the costume. Now Dr. Facilier’s signature color is a deep purple.</p><p>And damn. The first time I saw my boyfriend in that costume… well. We don’t talk about it.</p><p>Honestly this is a dream come true. Well, not the part where Remus is on house arrest. He’s doing alright though. Just hates being cooped up.</p><p>“Roman, grab your stuff we’re here. Logan’s coming later, he’s with Patton right now.” My mom says</p><p>“Why are they spending so much time together lately?” I ask, frowning.</p><p>My mom looks at me like I’m an idiot. “Roman… I know you're oblivious… but how can you not notice when your own brother is dating someone?”</p><p>Holy shit.</p><p>Wow.</p><p>Welp.</p><p>I’m officially an oblivious idiot.</p><p>And Patton?</p><p>Who would've guessed?</p><p>Anyway, my mom drops me off by the back door to the stage. I walk in and Picani calls us all over. “Alright everyone! We have a show in a couple hours! It’s opening night so no pressure, but there’s a lot of pressure. Now, we’re going to do one last run through just to get everything polished. Then we’ll get into our costumes and warm up! Everyone ready? Right, let's go!”</p><p>As we do a final run through, I can tell that everyone is a little stressed and anxious, but there’s also excitement in the air. No one messes up their lines, and all the lights and sound is perfect. This is what I love about theater. When you see it all finally come together, and everyone gets excited and the flow of their lines turns into a second nature.</p><p>When we’re done with the run through, everyone grabs a drink and changes into their costumes. The stage crew goes around making sure everyone’s mic pack is on. You can practically feel the anticipation.</p><p>That’s when I notice that Virgil looks like he’s going to throw up. I knew it would happen, it’s his anxiety.</p><p>I walk over to him and put a hand on his shoulder, “Hey, look at me?”</p><p>He looks up.</p><p>“It’s normal to have stage fright your first time. Heck, I even threw up and dropped my mic pack in the toilet. But trust me, you're an amazing actor, and you’ve studied your lines twice as hard as I have. So when you go up there it’ll just flow, it’ll feel right. If anything, I think you're over prepared.”</p><p>Virgil gives me a small smile and I return it. “As they say: ‘Break a leg!’”</p><p>Picani calls us over and gives us a pep talk, “Alright everyone! You got this, you’ve worked hard for it! I’m not going to say it’s the same as a normal rehearsal, because it’s not. But it’s better than a rehearsal, it’s the real deal! Now! Everyone break a leg!”</p><p>I give Virgil’s hand a last squeeze and the play begins.</p><p>… </p><p>As I straighten up from my bow, the whole audience cheers. I’m sweating, and breathing hard, but holy hell is it worth it. The lights are almost blinding, but I can make out Logan, Patton and my mom’s faces in the crowd. They’re all smiling.</p><p>My heart feels like it might burst.</p><p>The curtails draw close and I feel something slam into my side. I look down to see Virgil hugging me tightly and smiling the brighest I’ve ever seen him smile.</p><p>I think my heart actually just burst.</p><p>“You were amazing!” He laughs.</p><p>“Thanks!” I say breathlessly.</p><p>He steps back, “You were right. It did just flow, almost like I was the actual character.”</p><p>“See!” I raise my fist triumphantly, “I told you so!”</p><p>When everyone has finally gotten changed back into their stage clothes, and Charlie has announced an after party at their house, I can finally see my moms. Virgil and I run up the auditorium stairs and into the school lobby.</p><p>Through the crowd I spot my moms, Logan, Patton and his parent. When they see us coming toward them, Jordan exclaims, “Roman! Virgil! You two did so well!”</p><p>Kiko and Reena hug me, “Roman, we’re so proud of you!”</p><p>“You kiddos did so well!” Patton says warmly, hugging both me and Virgil.</p><p>Logan smiles at us, “I never really understood why you would want to play professional make-believe, but I suppose it was rather enjoyable.”</p><p>I grin at him, “Thanks Lo.”</p><p>“Lo? No, my name is Logan.”</p><p>I roll my eyes before turning to my boyfriend, “Could you tell that it was his first show?” I ask, teasing.</p><p>Virgil’s face turns red, “Whatever.” He mumbles.</p><p>“Speaking of Virgil.” Jordan says, holding up their phone. “I was on the phone with his parents before the show. We had to do some discussing (and by discussing I mean arguing), and some negotiation, (and by negotiation I mean I didn’t give them much of a choice). But assuming Virgil wants to, he can stay here with Patton and I until he goes to college, or whatever he wants to do when he graduates.”</p><p>Holy fuck!</p><p>“Virgil! You can stay!” I squeal and hug him tight.</p><p>He just stares at Jordan, mouth open, looking like he had just seen a ghost. I poke him in the ribs. “Is that a yes?”</p><p>“YES!”</p><p>Everyone smiles. I pick my boyfriend up and spin him around, kissing him hard. Virgil is laughing and so am I. I don’t think I’ve felt this happy in a long time.</p><p>I didn’t realize how bad of a metal state I was in. And I didn’t do anything about it, I even tried to commit suicide.</p><p>But Virgil pulled me out of that dark dreary hole. He restored my will to live, and for that I will be forever grateful.</p><p>“I love you Virgil.”</p><p>“I love you too.”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Well, there you have it. Wow. It’s actually done. It’s honestly hard to believe, I’ve been working on this since June and it’s kind of surreal that I’m done. But I suppose all good things must come to an end.</p><p>It was such fun to write this. I love the characters, and I love writing. And it just fills me with a sense of belonging and happiness to know that I can put them into a story of mine and imagine them in a new way.</p><p>Sorry I’m getting sentimental, but I also want to thank everyone who’s given me support throughout this whole process, you all helped me even when I had no motivation. Special thanks to Duckgirl999 and MelodiRead, y’all are amazing!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
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